I am so nervous about going back to work. A couple weeks before I started my leave I got a promotion. I got a raise, a set shift schedule, and more hours. Now with the raise and more hours, I bring home twice as much as I did before. This is so great. But, at the same time, now we have a little baby at home. I think it will be really hard to be away for 45 hours a week. I am not sure if that is right for our family now. I don\'t want to let the opportunity slide by me though. I don\'t want them to think I cannot handle it. So, I am so not sure what to do. I think I will go back full time and just see. If it doesn\'t work out it doesn\'t work out and it is not like I planned on being at that job forever anyways if they take away my hours. Money is crucial but family is more important. I don\'t want to miss anything during Sierra growing up, but I don\'t want the electric to get shut off or not have anything to make for dinner either. What is a mom to do. What is a low income mom to do. Seth does not bring home enough to live on after they take child support and taxes. He makes enough to pay bills and rent, but no food or gas or diapers or other everyday expenses. We are always so stuck with money. I need to get my butt back in school, but how do I juggle that too?? I would have to sacrifice a lot of time with my kids to work and go to school. Who would clean the house or do laundry? So many things that I do, that couldn\'t or mostly wouldn\'t get done. I know money cannot buy happiness, but it would sure make my life easier and take away most of my problems. It would be nice to be able to be a stay at home mom, or not worry about grocery money for the week, car problems, day care, anything. It must be really nice. I am willing to put in the effort to get where I need to go. I feel like I just need the opportunity and support. I don\'t want to be a stereotypical young mother. I want to be successful too. I want to do so many things still. It is just a matter of that first step. Getting onto the bus. I just feel like it is so impossible. If there were someone who was in a similar situation and accomplished all of that, I would love to talk to you. I am not a superwoman. I am just a mom, wanting so much more for my kids, sick of being stuck in a shitty situation. I know it is up to me, and the thought makes me buckle under pressure.
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