So, I had a realationship before my anxiety, my first "Love", but in the end I really realized it was an abusive relationship and he never really loved me, I don tthink he even liked me, so how could I have been so in love with someone who didn't like me and was so mean too me? I Knew he was mean to me, but I wanted to believe he would change for me.. Anyway's, after that I had the anxiety, I don't know if any of it related to that relationship, but ever since I haven't had a real relationship.. Alot of it has to do with me not being able to go places, so no guy wants to deal with that.. & When I did meet good guy's I pushed them away, bc I didn't know how to do a real relationship, I guess my wall was to push guy's away.. & then I meet the bad boy's they r the ones I've been really intrested in and most attracted to.. Stupid & Wrong I know, and it sure hasn't helped the siutation…. But now, I'm starting to get better with my anxiety and trying to get out there again. I have been talking to a guy that I use to go to school with, we haven't been able to spend much time together bc of my crazy work schedule, but He is a huggeeee sweetheart, I pushed Him away once and was lucky to start talking too him again, but it's like it's not enough.. I'm still looking at other guy's and still looking for other guy's. I'm not a cheater, I hate cheater's, I have been cheated on many many many times. This guy is a sweetheart, but he isn't super hot, and he is far from a bad boy. He isn't really my type, honestly.. I don't know if it's just my insecurities and past, maybe even a little bit of my anxieties that is keeping me away, I don't know.. & Since I now have no friend's, bc I seem to choose bad friends as well as guy's, I don't really have anyone too talk to about it….. Ugh, it suck's.. I let anxiety control my life for so long, wasted so much time & now i feel like a teenager trying to make up for it…… <3
Related Articles
-
God
adam.l.tindall, , Anxiety, 0 -
Gratitude and Razorblades
Samsara211, , Anxiety, Anger, Anxiety, Depression, Therapist, Therapy, 0
Hello Tribe, I need to put pen to paper, or in this case fingers to the keyboard and bring...
-
Wants my anxiety to go away forever!!!!
angelmichelle019, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Relationships, 1
This anxiety has been getting to much to bare lately. Im so tense right now its not even funny....
-
I am on a mission!
denay, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Depression, Parenting, Relationships, Religion, 1
For the last year I have been going through different waves of depression! And I am currently at a...
-
I’m Old As Hell
OrangeTree, , Anxiety, Depression, Career, Child, PTSD, Therapy, 1
What happens when you get older? Apparently things get better or so they say. I’ve been thinking about my...
-
God
adam.l.tindall, , Anxiety, 0 -
Anxiety Should Not Be a Category of My Life
MissyJ, , Anxiety, OCD, Anxiety, Career, Sleep Disorders, 1
The other day I ran into a friend I hadn’t seen for a while. I entered into the library...
-
just confused
autumnlover3000, , Anxiety, Depression, LGBT, 2
i just lost about 5 friends. so i have no real life friends. also im confused on who i...
I totally agree w/ you.. but there has to be some sort of attraction & that feeling like you can\'t wait to see the guy, he gives you butterflies, all that good stuff..?? You also can\'t just be with someone bc they are a nice guy…. I think. Right?