I know it's been a long time since I've written a blog here but basically I thought I was starting to depend on this site a little too much. I've been trying to get out more and make friends and ultimately work on my social skills. Well, I can't really do that in front of a computer haha! So far it's been really good. I've been making friends at work and now I need to work on the ones I have. Staying positive has been the main key so far, it isn't always easy. I'm kind of like that SNL character "Debbie Downer." I try not to but at the worst time it sort of pops out. The other key is asking how others are doing and actually listening. I've been walking around with a victim complex for almost 2 years, no wonder I have so few friends! I'm thankful for the ones who have stayed and I seriously want to make things right. The latter hasn't been all that hard honestly however I still get awkward when it comes to sharing. Very few know I have OCD and for fear of oversharing I've decided to keep my mouth shut so I don't scare anyone away. (a friend kindly pointed out that I sometimes overstep my bounds as far as sharing is concerned and I can't help but agree)

Right now things are really hard at home. My dad lost his job after 16 years and there aren't any new jobs open in his line of work. My mother is trying to find a better paying job in her line of work and tensions are pretty high. My OCD sometimes keeps me worried that we'll end up losing the house or worse. I'm trying to move out on my own but now I'm scared my family will fall appart if I do. My parents are strong people but a person can only take so much before they snap.

I guess this is sort of an update and sadly a case of spraying my room for spiders (because I hate them and had to kill one) and letting the room air out so I don't get any headaches or nosebleeds from the fumes. I'll try to write here more often.