I was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder 6 months ago, and it has been the hardest months of my life. I’ve been doing therapy, seeing psychiatrist, and even getting medication but I still don’t feel any better. My panic attacks are getting worse but the depression isn’t as severe but the suicidal thoughts are. I feel so alone and crazy. I tried to tell my mom that, and she barley even listed to me and said “have you ever thought about committing yourself to a hospital”. I just wanted to be heard, listened to, and told everything was gonna be okay. That’s literally all she said, I got up and walked away but cried my eyes out on the floor because she just proved me right. They do think I’m crazy.. like am I? I just wanna be like everyone else, why is god or whoever is up there making it so hard for me to be happy. It just feels like I can’t breathe and I’ll never be happy, sometimes I do wanna go through with it and off myself. There has to be something better out there than the life I am living..

  1. twiggysiren 2 years ago

    I just want you to know that you’re not alone. I can definitely relate, although my diagnosis is schizophrenia, not bipolar disorder. I often question why God is allowing me to suffer the way I am. I’m sure there’s a reason for it, even if it’s not made clear to me. But you are not crazy, your writing is readable and logical. I hope there is something out there that is better for us than what we are currently facing. My best to you.

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  2. robertjames101 2 years ago

    Well, you are going through a tough phase. It seems like that you are suffering from depression apart from bipolar disorder. I would suggest that you need good company first who listens to you with warmth and care. Secondly, you should search for a good counselor for proper therapy. It will help you to get away with this problem in a better way. As far as your mother is concerned, you have to realize that it is your suffering and your journey. So, it is your burden and you can do this! God has given strength to every struggling soul to succeed in life! You must not lose hope and keep strong faith in God! Clonidine might help you to heal: mangoclinic.com/clonidine-for-anxiety-benefits-dosage-and-reviews/

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