Dislaimer: has very mild content that may be offensive to some people. I just had to vent.I was in a loveless marriage for 13 years. Now that im in a relationship with a person who wants to spend the rest of his life with me and “loves me with all of his soul” it seems like I'm in the same predicament. There are very distinct differences in both relationships of course. My ex husband was a selfish abusive piece of shit. My current bf is a loving attentive man… that is until it is time to be “together”. He never wants to be intimate and it makes me feel so inadequate, unlovable, undesirable, etc. It obviously doing nothing for my self esteem. Why does this keep happening to me. I know that being intimate isn't all there is to.a relationship but it is a big part of it. If you can't come together and share those moments and be vulnerable together then what is there? My bf and I have been together for over a year and it's like we're an old married couple. He mover in with me early on in our relationship which was a terrible idea but I wasn't in the right state of mind and figured what harm could it do. How wrong I was. We fight all the time over stupid things. He has issues that he doesn't want to admit to and I have my own issues, bad health, work and my kids. The fact that we can't even spend a moment together on a one to one level is something completely devastating to me. I don't want to spend my life and more years in a relationship like this. This man is an awesome man don't get me wrong but he has to work through a lot of stuff for himself and I just can't help him with those things.i can support him but I can't help him. I can barley help myself. I just don't know what to do. I'm miseable, disappointed, disatisfied, sad, mad… uggg!!!! I'm getting so sick of this!

1 Comment
  1. Mz_Unda_Std 5 years ago

    Thank you. I just have to figure out if this is where I want to be and if I'm willing to put up with this. I have been in abusive relationships before and this is not like any of those but still damaging in different ways. My bf is a great guy he is just dealing with ptsd and possible alcoholism. He won't admit that he has a probalem and maybe he doesn't but the way he acts it seems like it. I'm not judging him I just have del with people with substance abuse problems and it just takes a toll on me. I just don't have that much to give. I am dealing with my own anxiety and depression, health issues plus my youngest has health issues as well and is special needs. I probably sound selfish but I just have to worry about me and my kids. My life is just so crazy that I get extremely overwhelmed. Hard for me to find a balance. I guess I have a lot of things to sort out. =/

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