Sometimes I still feel like the scared thirteen year old obsessing about suicide and cutting. I don’t know where to start in order to put my life back together. I guess having will power would be a good start. I don’t have any and haven’t felt like I’ve had any for awhile.
I think I write stories to fix what I’ve felt has gone wrong or to give a character something I felt I haven’t had. They deal with strife but I am able to create an end to their road and turn it into a happy ending. Why can’t I do the same with my life?
Yes it was a bit of a surprise to hear my grandmother say she wanted to end her life but I can see why she says it! The world is so f*cked up.
I look back and see some of my entries change topics often. I guess I vent on all topics running through my head and things that happen as I write these.
My brother just came home, it was his last day of school, and he was telling me about this kid who is a complete a**. I knew the kid when I went to the school. I thought he was an a** and I was the quiet, introverted geek. I worry about my brother. He just told me that same kid came to a friend’s house when he was there…I worry the kid might try something. He’s my younger brother, I guess it’s the normal older sibling protective thing. I hope if the kid does try something, my brother can at least defend himself. I just told him the human mouth is one of the dirtiest things in the world lol, that would be interesting.
Anyway, I think my little dark patch cleared up for awhile.
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Down…
S1nful_Sa1nt, , Depression, 0
So today, well,yesterday, I managed to snap my mind to a slightly better place than usual. I even walked...
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Fucked up asshole
Reyesik, , Depression, Addiction, Anxiety, Career, Depression, Relationships, 0
Well god damn my life sucks. Everything has been bad in my life i mean damn it one thing...
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Tick, tick, tick….
xillah, , Depression, Anxiety, Child, Questions, Relationships, 0
I don't know why, but I've launched back into baby-crazy mode again. This happened when I was just about...
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37 weeks and any time now…
BD, , Depression, Anger, Child, 0
The obstetric gyneacologist fella at the hospital told me on Monday that I’m going to have a very big...
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2/25/14 update
Delcorin, , Depression, Career, Child, Depression, Grief, Relationships, 0
It's been a while, but nothing new to report really. We still aren't really talking but she was at...
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Funny but sad
Azura_Mikio, , Depression, Depression, Grief, Questions, Religion, Therapist, 0
When I think about it… my life kinda makes me just want to laugh at loud. All the bullshit,...
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In a state of loss..
FarReaching, , Depression, Depression, Relationships, 0
Just a quick update. I'm still here, still struggling on. I still haven't come to terms with recent events....
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Feeling Better
Lost_Bella, , Depression, Therapist, 0
Well ik from my last blog i scared a few of u or even made people sad, but today...