I've had a day from hell!! i managed to force myself to work this morning, but unfortunately after very little sleep i was not able to focus on the job, and i encountered endless problems along the way! I held it together for all of 2 hours before finally admitting defeat and going home! My boss is holidaying in cyprus so i have a bit more freedom than usual. I went to my community mental health place for some emergency therapy to try and calm me down but it didn't help this time 🙁 i couldn't say what i wanted to say with this south african woman trying to calm me down, and a 'doctor in training' sitting right in front of me staring!! I've never felt so anxious in a therapy session, my stomache was hunched, shoulders tense and my face and palms were sweating! I sat in silence for a couple of minutes while she tried to get me to breathe more calmly. i did manage to distract their attention for a couple of minutes tho by showing them a photo album i put together of my photography! Overall i left with a list of 'distraction ideas' and a slightly calmer out take on the world. When i got back home i went straight back to work afterwards to finish off – i did..but im not happy with how it looks, i rushed it. So i packed up, came home and got ready for my other work at the leisure center..I walked through the doors and felt releived to be somewhere im familiar with what i have to do..But as soon as i walked into the area where i work i read the whiteboard where our new (horrible) superviser had written a really long bitchy message to us all, basically saying how we should all be working harder and prepping for her during the week..she listed all the jobs that she could moan about! and if we don't 'put our arses in gear' she will have to hire somebody new, meaning our shifts would be cut! (HARSH) i've been working there for 5 years! she's been there maybe 5 months!!! I felt myself fire up inside as i read this..Imediately felt the urge to leave and quit forever but i held it together for my 2 hour shift..i think its so dis-respectful for her to slag off her collegues like that..its humiliating!! Me and my brother are working 2moro; we're going to reply (as nicely as we can) with how we feel! GR this could be messy!! 11 hour shift on saturday..5 hours on sunday…i'm dreading it :'(
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I've Had Better Days…
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Hey F, Does it really make a difference if this is “real life” or a dream? ~♥~ Either way,...
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There is so much I could talk about right now relating to my depression and how terrible it is...