It’s been a while since I’ve been on this site. I feel like for months I’ve been actively avoiding my problems hoping they’ll disappear, which in turn only seems to make them so much worse. That seems to be my specialty in life a this point. My 18th birthday is in a few months, August to be exact, and my anxiety about it has grown tenfold. I’ll be an adult. It seems crazy. I can’t do anything on my own, even with all my issues with my mother i don’t know how to live without her, she’s always done everything for me, a dependence I never realized I had. I know nothing, and to be completely honest i never had any intentions of actually making it this far. Some would say that’s an accomplishment, that i persevered through my troubles and came out on top but it feels like a lie. Nothing feels real but everything seems like too much. Life becomes so much sometimes i just want to go. I just want it all to stop. It’s times like that I think about my little sister, the only person who truly means something to me and to leave her would be heartbreaking. I feel like reality is crashing down on me. When others ask what i want to do, what college i want to go to (Even though I’ve technically dropped out of High School), who i want to be, I have no answers. Since I was 12 years old I never really thought 18 would ever be real, that I would live long enough to get to it. To actually think about a life, one on my own has never been something I’ve done. How can I decide my future when I’ve never truly considered living to begin with?
-
None
onelyric, , Depression, Depression, 0
So crisp and sunny it is this morning, I know I must spend some time in this atmosphere enjoying...
-
Car accident anxiety
Teee, , Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, OCD, Anxiety, Child, Sleep Disorders, 3
So I had a car accident a couple days ago. I wanted to change lanes and the cars were...
-
Growing up with God
pinkobsession, , Depression, Child, Domestic Abuse, Obesity, Questions, Relationships, Religion, Sex Therapy, 1
I was born in Salt Lake City Utah. Yes the Mormon capital of the world! That is where the...
-
A new beginning
aprild, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Depression, Domestic Abuse, Emotional Abuse, PTSD, Sex Therapy, Therapy, 0
Hi! I am April. I have anxiety, depression and ptsd. I just started therapy to deal with my childhood...
-
Just letting out my trouble
mysteryofmusic, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Child, Medication, Therapist, 2
Hello my name is Brendan and I have anxiety. Lol I've always wanted to do that, ok time to...
-
You Can Be Good Yet Fail
EastAfrique, , Depression, Wellness Tips, Child, Self Esteem, 0
I’ve never done well with competition. As a child it gave me a deep sense of inferiority and inadequacy....
-
Regret
Star2015, , Depression, Anger, 0
Last night I opened up to my husband. I regret the way I did it. I expressed my feelings....
-
TORTURE
leeevansalike, , Depression, Anxiety, Depression, 2
My life, A dream for some, A nightmare for me,A rollercoaster ride I'm unable to leave,An intelligent man-Ha! Who...