For as long as I can remember I always wanted to be a mom. I had the idea that I was going to have three kids, have the love of my life, and I was going to make sure their lives were going to be better for them. I’d be happy with one if I didn’t have three kids but something has changed. I haven’t dated anyone since I was 16 (that’s already 7 years ago). My life is work and more work. That’s right around my romcom character is supposed to be horrified that all I do is work and I need to run out into the rain for my soul mate. The real me just shrugs it off because I work hard to do what I do. I’m not entirely successful but I’m working to be successful. After the incident last year and relapsing into a deep depression, my perception on having a family and being married shifted. That might not be what’s meant for me at least now. I’m not looking to meet any one because I’m not really interested in looking. I have such severe issues that opening myself up to someone will be a big mess that I don’t have to deal with right now. I like my work and doing my work. Honestly I’m closing an 8 year chapter and starting a new one. I don’t know where it’s going or what’s going to happen but I’m looking forward to it. Okay I’ll be the only single one amongst my cousin but that’s okay. I don’t have to do anything to just fit in. I have too much going on to worry if a new guy I’m seeing can handle everything. My odd schedule, my creative job, the fact that below the waist about 84% of the time I feel nothing. I don’t have enough time to worry about things like that