For as long as I can remember I always wanted to be a mom. I had the idea that I was going to have three kids, have the love of my life, and I was going to make sure their lives were going to be better for them. I’d be happy with one if I didn’t have three kids but something has changed. I haven’t dated anyone since I was 16 (that’s already 7 years ago). My life is work and more work. That’s right around my romcom character is supposed to be horrified that all I do is work and I need to run out into the rain for my soul mate. The real me just shrugs it off because I work hard to do what I do. I’m not entirely successful but I’m working to be successful. After the incident last year and relapsing into a deep depression, my perception on having a family and being married shifted. That might not be what’s meant for me at least now. I’m not looking to meet any one because I’m not really interested in looking. I have such severe issues that opening myself up to someone will be a big mess that I don’t have to deal with right now. I like my work and doing my work. Honestly I’m closing an 8 year chapter and starting a new one. I don’t know where it’s going or what’s going to happen but I’m looking forward to it. Okay I’ll be the only single one amongst my cousin but that’s okay. I don’t have to do anything to just fit in. I have too much going on to worry if a new guy I’m seeing can handle everything. My odd schedule, my creative job, the fact that below the waist about 84% of the time I feel nothing. I don’t have enough time to worry about things like that
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Evan..., , Depression, LGBT, Marriage & Family, Child, Grief, Therapist, 1
Vent You know what’s cool? Not being able to look at yourself in the mirror because your body disgusts...
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The Rain
Little Demon29457, , Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, Teens, Anxiety, Depression, Sleep Disorders, Suicide, 0
When I was younger there was one Fourth of July that stayed in my memories. It was raining and...
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Just another Nikki Maxwell’s diary entry
Lunamelody, , Marriage & Family, Teens, 0
My dad’s talking to my five-year-old sister about lions and antelopes and to not show emotions. He said this...
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more detailed update
delane1, , Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, OCD, Anxiety, Relationships, Therapist, Weight Loss, 0
Again, i’m not sure this will remain here or be deleted, one more time…. Seems like between “technology” and...
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Writing without putting too much thought into it.
latinxluxe, , Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, Child, Depression, Domestic Abuse, Forgiveness, Religion, Sleep Disorders, Stress, 0
3:25AM: I haven’t been getting enough sleep lately. Too much or too little. This year has been one of...
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fear….
delane1, , Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, OCD, Anxiety, Questions, Relationships, 0
How could i stay in a marriage that wasn’t what it was supposed to be? Why would it take...
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barely holding on…
delane1, , Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, OCD, Anxiety, Grief, Relationships, 4
*sigh i knew this was going to be a tough time for me, but i had no idea the...
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I’m hollow inside this futile, meaningless, godless life.
BeccaSweet, , Anxiety, Depression, LGBT, Marriage & Family, Teens, Career, Suicide, 2
Since my life has been nuked, everything around me is dead or dying. I don’t have any friends or...