I was diagnosed with moderate-to-severe depression in 2020, though I’ve known about it for years. I’ll save my backstory for another time. I know that there are others who will unfortunately relate to it, but now is not the time.

I saw a counselor for about six months through a local clinic, and her advice and validation helped me to actually start on my journey to a better life. I also started medication, which allows me enough clear-headedness to actually stop the mental spirals when they start. Medication is not the answer for everyone, but it is definitely something that helped me.

My journey is ongoing, and I don’t know that it will ever end. My childhood guardians did a real number on my psyche, and trying to rewire your own brain is no easy feat, as many others with depression and mental illness can attest. Some days are easier than others. Recently, I’ve been in an apathetic slump, made all the more frustrating by the fact that there’s no real reason for it. I’ve started a new job that I love, and that pays well enough for my family to live comfortably. I have advancements and positive things happening in my personal life that I can’t talk about at the moment. Looking at my life, I should be happy. And I am. But I am also apathetic, preventing me from exercising (the Texas summer heat is not helping), keeping me in bed, and keeping me from making my living environment tidier.

I hope to overcome these things in time, a little at a time. Better habits for a better life. And I want to help others dealing with the same things I have been dealing with for so long, which is part of why I joined this community. So I will upload my story at a later date, and talk more about how I’ve struggled, and the things that have helped (and those that very much have not). And I’ll become involved in the forums, and be there for others who need it. Having someone truly hear and understand is something that I didn’t often get for a long time, not really, but I know that it would have helped significantly.

So hello. I look forward to meeting you all.

 

 

[Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash ]

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