Doing my best…

I saw my shrink today.  He was nice.  Always is…  I think he’s a pretty good doctor. My dosage is taking a major jump, but given how I have been feeling, that’s probably for the best.  Working on my portfolio, and wanting to work on my play – I am so lethargic, and lazy (the depression compounds that), I don’t ever seem to get anything done.  I always used to get my sh*t done, somehow.  I was once a very productive person.  I guess, that will all come back to me.  

My friend Maria is getting on my nerves pretty hard core.  I feel as though I am being ducked, and that’s making me even angrier.  For the sake of our friendship, I hope she does not keep this crap up, because she is seriously trying my patience.  But, oh well… 

I refuse to stay upset today.  Fleeting frustrations and sadnesses drift in and out of my mind (which is tending toward the depressive, at the moment), but I reject them, because I am trying to accomplish too much, right now, to surrender.  And, I have at least a few things to feel good about.  🙂

And, I am fighting to stay as positive as I can, because I know good things are happening, right now.  Today, I should have time to work on my artistic pursuits, even if I don’t have the time or energy to get as much done around the house as I’d like.  I have my parents’ anniversary gift covered – the mahogany box with one of my photos as a tile inlay on top.  It’s pretty cool.  I plan to get another made for myself, with a different photo.  Probably one of the crazy looking puddle reflections.  

I also got a poster size print of one of my pictures – the lighthouse shot from my gallery.   It looks great.  My portfolio is growing and great – I just need to narrow it down appropriately to be shown around to people.  I am hoping to get more work matted and ready to show as of this weekend.  And, I am going to take what I have, along with the digi portfolio to a few different places, next week.  But, I have to get on the ball with this art dealer on Sheridan – trying to make this show happen.  And, if it doesn’t, I need to be okay with that.  I just git back into photography recently, after a long hiatus, and it’s been going great.

Just talked to Ace…  his visit this weekend is by far the coolest thing going on, at the moment.  I am not able to make much in the way of preparations – I would like to get my place looking a little better before hosting a good friend for the first time (esp one visiting from so far out of town), but I have been so depressed, I have actually lost my previous momentum withthe whole house work bit.  I will be lucky to get the appropriate laundry washed for the weekend.  Better do that forth with…