Yesterday was full of new experiences for me and while they were all positive, I'm feeling rather exhausted by the change and even though nothing's wrong, it makes me want to revert back to how things used to be just because what is familiar is comforting. Which I know is a bad habit to get into. Let me explain things a little more in detail so they make sense…

First off, we got a new dog, which was really exciting since I've been wanting one for months. We have had our miniature pinscher for ten years, and while I love her to pieces, she's not always the cuddliest dog. I wanted a bigger dog that would snuggle with me and want to be pet while our little dog is being a diva. We adopted a four year old golden retriever beagle mix, Misty, from the APL and she's so quiet and sweet. She loves cuddling and getting attention and so far she doesn't have any really bad habits. When we first introduced her to my min pin Paisley, Paisley was just timid and kept walking over to me and avoiding the situation, so I didn't force anything. They were fine until my mom was eating her lunch and they were both sitting nearby, watching and hoping for food. Paisley got territorial and snapped at Misty and then Misty charged Paisley and pushed her down and cornered her using her head and they were both growling and yelping. It happened so fast, I couldn't see if either of them was biting, but we did have to rush and pull Misty off of Paisley. It happened again later over a toy. Both times, I was so scared I wanted to cry. I immediately started wondering if this new dog was a good idea and I just wanted things to go back to how they were. I also feel like the pressure's on me becuase I was the one that wanted a new dog the most and I'm responsible for her. My parents had to spend over a couple hundred dollars on her stuff like a crate, bed, brush, food, etc. A lot of people say this is normal behavior when you introduce a new dog to an old dog and that it usually gets better, but I don't know if I can handle this. It's making me really anxious. What if I'm in over my head?

The other thing that happened was that I went on a second date with this guy I've been talking to and it went really great. He took me to a nice bowling alley and we bowled for over two hours, bantering and flirting in-between turns. It was fun and comfortable. On our first date it was harder for me to tell if he was into me or not, but this time I could tell that he was at least a little bit. It is hard for me to tell HOW into me he is. He'll be maybe mildly flirtatious and then out of the blue, he'll say something REALLY flirty and it's like, "Oh wow, he likes me." By the end of the night, I was sure that he does. The only thing I'm not used to with something like this is having to read the guy for signs. In the past, and especially in my most recent 3-year relationship, everything just kind of happened all at once and I never had to try or flirt or read the guy. They were forward with me and I was forward with them- it's the kind of person I am. Even though everything went great, I missed the times when everything could just happen and I could just kiss a guy or take his hand without worrying whether or not he's going to like it. That's how it was with my most recent boyfriend- I'd never been more comfortable around anyone in my whole life. But I know all of this is a normal part of dating and growing up. I just need to get used to it.

All in all, I'm just really anxious and exhausted right now. I just want to go home after work and take a long nap. I'm hoping that one of the dogs will snuggle up and join me on the couch, but then again I'm worried about one getting jealous and fighting over me since so far I'm both their favorites. I miss the days when everything was easy and familiar. I'm so tired…