I was away from home for about 4 days, three nights. My boyfriend took me to netcare because I told him that I had a suicidal thought. Now, I wasn't going to act on this thought, it was just a thought. I have too many things to live for, and I don't believe in choosing when my life ends. Anyway….we walk in and as soon as suicide is said, the lady freaks out, says it's illegal for me to leave and I end up staying while my boyfriend goes back home……after staying for 6 long hours just waiting. =(

The next day, they told me I was going to a hospital. Now, I was a little relieved to hear this, thinking I'd meet with a doctor and go home with set in schedule therapy. Instead, I was taken to a mental hopsital. I was to stay there for 72hours, and weekends didn't count. My 21st birthday was just this Friday, and I was in a mental hopsital. I wasn't allowed to go outside, any clothing that had strings were taken away, they watched me have showers, it was always cold, and the food was soooo shitty that I just didn't eat until my boyfriend came to visit me. He always brought in some food.

So, Friday comes along, it's April Fool's Day, so everyone's pulling out some pranks on others while I'm just upset about where I am for my 21st birthday. Heh. Then, after talking so many times to the nurses about getting out that day, being told that there was no way like 50 times, I gave up. I gave up and decided to just enjoy my weekend with crazy people. I grabbed a couple of people and had them do drum beats and beat boxing in the hallway while I sang songs. That was pretty fun, and I was finally enjoying myself. Then, my assigned doctor comes up to me and wants to talk. I explain the whole situation to her to see if I could get out that day. She gives me bad news and says that I'd have to wait until Monday.

Well, I was pretty prepared for the weekend anyway, so it wasn't too much of a surprise for me. I go back to my singing spot with the other two people I dragged out to sing with me and start another song. Then, it's time to line up for dinner. I'm excited because I was enjoying myself and for the first time, I was first in line. We all go into the cafeteria, I get myself some grape juice and just wait for the cook to come out so I can get some food. Next thing I know, the nurses are all yelling for me. I complain because I lost my spot in line, lol. Then, they said I was gonna be discharged. I had this cup of juice in my hand and just was soooo happy and excited, jumping up and down, running around, giving all the nurses hugs. I was sooooo happy.

After dinner, I packed all of my things, called my boyfriend to come and pick me up, and signed some papers to leave. Got to the front, saw my boyfriend, and we left. But, there was a mission…..I had a party to save!

About two months ago, I had reserved a bar for my 21st birthday party. Sandeep canceled it, so I had to go back to the place in person and let them know that the party was still on. I also had to let all of my friends know that the party was still on. I mean, it was pretty crazy, but I had sooo much fun. I gave a lot of lap dances to my female friends, and so many people got sooo drunk. I had an open bar, so they could all drink as much as they wanted, and they did. lol.

Buuuut, I ended up drinking waaaay too much myself. I mean, I didn't black out and do anything crazy. I just got really drunk. I had to spend an entire day healing from the drinks. Today, I'm muuuuuch better. I might start trying different wines, or just eat some real food. I think I'm going for the food. I'm hungray as hell.

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