ok guys. so i finally took everyones advice as i am now extremely sleep deprived from spending all night checking things and i talked to my psych teacher who helped me walk over to the counseling center. ok counseling for me is terrifying, just based on how i have grown up and everything it is the worst scenario i could ever imagine. needless to say it took me about 30 min to walk inside just to make an appointment. it was traumatizing to say the least, i started hyperventilating, shaking violently you know the works. then i we were done and i felt sooooo guilty that i had given in and gone and i have a damn appointment for tues. they told me i can cancel but i cant talk on the phone it scares me and god knows i cant walk in to cancel it and i cant go by myself. worst thing ever knowing i need it but the guilt after is too much and i have this impending sense of doom im going to get in trouble. ok anyway so after all of that i continued on with my dad, swimming running etc. well on my run a bee flew into the lip of my shoe and stung me. i didnt know what to do so i kept running finally stopped tried pulling the stinger out to no avail and hobbled back. 2 days later my foot is so swollen it wont fit into anything not even flip flops, itches like there is no tomorrow and today is suppossed to be my long run day. if i dont go i will freak out because its part of my routine so its going to be interesting. in all i blame me trying to get to the counseling center for getting stung by a bee and having these side effects.
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HI I HAVE READ OTHERS BLOGS ENTRIES FROM YOU ..YOU SOUND TIRED AND FRUSTRATED ( LIKE ME 🙂 ). TRY GOING TO THE COUNSELING IF DOOM IS WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN THEN BE IT ( SEE IT LIKE THE END OF YOUR MISERY) .. NOTHING BAD IS GOING TO HAPPEN AND YOU MIGHT GET THE HELP YOU ARE LOOKING FOR..GOOD LUCK.