Hi everyone as some of you might know I have been managing my OCD very well and living a better life but this morning at work one of the people I help support had a clonic tonic seizure now I have never seen this before I've had my training for epilepsy but it never prepared me for this. I was in the kitchen doing his medication when I heard a bang I ran to his bedroom and he was on the floor having a seizure I immediately got his rescue meds and started taking not of his seizure and timing it reminding myself once 5 minutes comes and he is still fitting I need to administer the rescue meds. Now I have had seen him take several siezure but never one this severas we got to 4 minutes I really started to panic and was certain this man was going to die the colour in his face changed the noises he was making was like he couldn't breath but luckily seconds before I was going to give him his rescue meds he came round and I notice his right temple was swollen with a small,graze and bruise and had urinated which is common as you lose all body control and he must have banged his head as he fell altogether it took 30 minutes for him to fully recover and since I have had horrible thoughts of him dying and it being my fault and have been constantly washing myhands with bleach. Witnessing this I was a wreck but tried hard to stay calm and do my job but it was scary for me and upsetting I am now wondering was this a trigger for my OCD thoughts and hand washing since or is it just a natural reaction and also due to me nearly finished a 24.5 hour shift and being tired?