I'm so tired from the daily depression and yet I have another problem today I just can't win.

Today with the rain I've developed yet another FM flare.  My head hurts, my body hurts, my  muscles feel like someone took them out and scraped the layers right off them.  My skin is so tender that my grandson wanted a hug and I cried it was so painful.  My hair even hurts!!  Any kind of noise no matter how small it may be sounds like a bomb going off in my ears.  Looking at the television makes my eyes hurt and feel like they are gonna pop right out of my head!

The restless leg syndrome is back so I can't sit still.  If I do sit still then all the nerves in my legs and feet go haywire and the only relief from that is to move around but moving around kills my back and all my muscles and everything else that is already hurting. My fingers are even burning with pain typing this.   I'm feeling so so bad and the depression doesn't want to be left out so it's hanging around too.  I've had one axiety attack last night and today and I don't even know what caused it except maybe the flare.

I have my grandson here with me like always and I'm trying to play with him and keep him happy because it's been raining and storming and he's so afraid of it.  I try to be brave and let him know it's ok but deep inside of me the thunder roars and brings back my younger years when something horrible happened to me and when I woke up it was storming so I associate the storms with that horrible event.  Maybe one day I will blog about that incident but then again I would probably trigger someone else reading it and I don't mean to do that.  I don't know whether to blog it or not, doing so would be good to get it out especially now when it's so fresh from the storms but I don't want to cause trouble either so I'll have to think on that more.

I'm going to try and stay busy with my grandson so maybe some of this pain will calm down or maybe I can get him to watch another movie with me but I still can't sit still so I'll figure out something I'm sure…ok this is long enough I will stop.  I will think about the other blog some more.


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