Okay, so I’ve been struggling with Intrusive thoughts which have made me feel not in control of my body. I went to a a friend to ask for help, more so to ask for a place to rant. After ranting for so long, they wanted me to get help from someone. That’s when I’d gone to the suicide hotline that brought me here. Now that i’m here, I feel a bit lifted from this dark place of depression. Yet, I still feel captured by this overwhelming sense confusion and helplessness. I know talking to someone won’t get rid of the intrusive thoughts. But, I thought it might calm them maybe? I don’t know. I’ve always wondered what people who don’t go through this feel like. I wonder if I will ever be mentally stable enough to be like them. “Normal” if you will. My mom doesn’t make it any better. She always refers to me as lazy, like my dad. He’s not the greatest but at least he supports me to some extent I guess. All I’ve ever wanted was to be understood, listened too. But I could never get the simplest things out of people. The ones who are supposed to love me and be there for me. I think this community is helping me. But then again I still feel like something is wrong. Maybe I expected too much. I always expect others to see my point of view. But I supposed I’ve been too optimistic with people. I really hope I can find some time for myself to reevaluate my mental stability and get checked out by a licensed professional, instead of having to deal with it myself. Maybe I’ll even get a girlfriend and settle down in a home fit for two people, or even have kids. Probably not through I’m not really fond of kids haha. If I find the right girl, I’ll decide then.
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Life
Bchemist4life, , Depression, Depression, 0
Life has a way of sneaking up on you..One day you realize that you're older than you want to...
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I think I need to vent…
TheLifeOfJade, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Depression, Grief, Medication, Questions, 1
Today we took Mason (my dog, if you don't know) to the Vet because he needed to get on...
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The I''s
jenieve79, , Depression, Medication, Sleep Disorders, 2
I dont think I am getting better. With all the meds im on and the drs i seem to...
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Cu Reabtha
sosgirl, , Depression, Depression, Parenting, Therapist, 0
Now that it's my senior year, I've learned an important lesson: School faculty is twisted. I have a teacher...
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Help!
mimita522, , Anxiety, Relationships, 3
I hate when people say just snap out of it or think positive. I mean dont you think if...
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Crazy…I know
LonelyFemaleForever, , Depression, Anxiety, Career, Grief, Questions, Religion, Sleep Disorders, Suicide, Weight Loss, 0
Where did my will to continue to fight this go? Where did my plans and goals go? I know...
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Fibromyalgia
GoldenGirl, , Anxiety, Anger, Anxiety, Career, Chronic Pain, Depression, Medication, Sleep Disorders, 0
Well it's about time for another blog I think to update you all on what's been going on in...
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What is the real answer?
Ailigdrac, , Anxiety, Depression, 0
From every moment of my youth I remember being helpful and to every degree of the term empathic. Granted...
Hi Toby, in my experience’s Ive found that I get more out of a conversation / relationship when I am up front about what I am looking for. Hopefully, If they are not able to help you (the way you think you need help) they will know of someone who can. I know it can be hard to open up and share personal thoughts or concerns, but the more you can honestly talk about, the better help you may get..
Sending hope and hugs, Iris