I’m kind of venting here.

 I’m starting to fill with anxiety & Depression.

     My mom is comin back home, after a month and hakf at my brotheres.

recuperating from a heart attack and a pacemaker  put in, and to gain her strainght back.

   Everrytime I turn around it seems I’m crying,

  Just one thought or word and I start crying.

        I wrote her a letter telling her all what had been going on v=from the time she left my bro’s place to go to the city.(I did’t know any of this)

              I told her two of my cousins were willing to take me to her, on were i live and the other in the city,He was going to come down and pick me up taake me there bring me back home and go back to the city.

  I have loving cousins.

      we spent 1/2 an hour with her  becuse when we got ther we found out her surgery was bumped back to supper time. They had all day with her.

   They could have  phoned  but didn’t. I could have caught the bus to be with her. But NO they were only thinking of them selves.

This is part of what I wrot in the letter I’m going to give her.

I can’t talk to her about it, because i will forget a lot of things.

I just want it all to stop. I start to cry and then i get angry and take it out on my cats, just yelling at them. Also i’m throwin my extra coffee cups against the cupboard. I hate my bro’s and sister for what they did to me.

I wan’t to just to go back to my normal depression, where i just cry without thinking about all that mess to make me cry.

   I see my pdoc on thursday, I hope i can talk it out with him. If not i don’t know what i’ll do?


SORRY FOR BEING SO LONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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