I made my profile name "KnockedDown" largely because I want to feel like yeah, I've been knocked down, life floored me, but I can get back up, it'll be okay. That's kind of how I feel today.

My ex got my resume finished for me today, we had a few (very brief) texts back and forth, all about her, nothing about me, which is fine. She was nervous, she's busy getting together a proposal for a company to do their website and start her own business. She's very ambitious and I always admired that part of her. But I shouldn't make anymore of this blog about her.

I got paid today, paid off the last of my tuition for the semester (100% out of pocket, I'm proud of that) and I bought my brother a little gift of a $10 League of Legends card. He's been super awesome to me and gave me a hug last night and a pep talk when he saw I was really down. He's been there for me this whole time even if he's much younger than me in some ways it feels like he's been a big brother and I need that right now.

I'm starting to think maybe I'll be okay, not really because of anything in particular but because I realize that there's more to life than me and there are a lot of people worse off than me. All the people I work with largely are very angry or frustrated all day, and swear and complain and just generally are unpleasant. I try to be positive and tell people "Hey it's not gonna be that bad, it's just work, at the end of the day it's over you have your pay" but thats not for everyone.

I got paid today, that helped, and before I left some pink-haired girl who must work the nightshift in the warehouse because I've never seen her said "Hey there, I like your shirt" but she walked off before I could say anything back. Small ego boost I think that was flirting but I'm terrible at picking it up…

In any case, she kinda reminded me of my ex, she dyed her hair once like that and she had the same body type and all that. Made me smile a bit.

Now I have a huge project for my class due tommorow and I haven't really been able to focus through all this. I'm calm now so hopefully I can grind some out it's just not gonna be easy. Wish me luck guys, onward and upward!