Hi, this is my first time ever seeking advice through a blog..I would appreciate any comments, or advice anyone can make here to help me understand and also help a friend….
I have been friends/dating a person who says he once suffered from OCD…He has shared with me about OCD and the rituals, and how much it imprisoned him while he suffered with it..He was eventually able to overcome the behavior, and claims he is free from engaging in the behavior…He says he is now much better.
What I don't understand is how he has been able to help me by giving great rational advice regarding my own emotional life obstacles..I care for him deeply..I find him physically attractive, and our minds connect in so many ways. He is one intelligent soul. However, when it comes to feelings..I feel he is not in touch with his emotions. There are times I sense I am talking to a robot. Like the character from StarTrek: Data..A computerized person…He has asked me before "Can't you tell that I care for you and love you?" My answer is NO!!! I cannot feel his heart. He is a wonderful person but disconnected from his feelings..We have spoken about this disconnection, and he does agree that there are thoughts going on in his mind when during a conversation I feel, sense, perceive he is no longer there..As though I am talking to no one…I feel an emotional void completely
I have asked myself if it could be me?? I have analyzed the situation and don't think it is me..I think that no matter who he ends up dating, loving, and so forth the other person will experience similiar feelings..A friend of mine who is a School Psycologist informed me that this has to do with being wired a differently…She explained that people who suffer from OCD or OCPD are very intelligent people logical, rationale and so forth however when it comes to connecting in an emotional intimate way this can be difficult for the person. The mental intellect is quite higher than the emotional???
Please help me understand the situation…I apologize if I have offended anyone I consider myself a beginner in understanding about OCD …
Thank you!!! Much aprreciated
Snorkelman,
Thank you so much for your advise, sharing your experience/knowledge. I appreciate it more than you know..So this zoning out makes sense, and so if I understand correctly there is a disconnect from mind to emotions right? Something like this? He is not taking medicine and has not taken any. I am wondering maybe you can help with this question..The zoning can it be overcome?? Or is this for good? I definitely agree that therapy will help him. In the Inland Empire area do you recommend any therapists?
If I think of any other questions I will get back to you, and I am open to any other information regarding OCD you can provide me with..You commented about OCD not being cured and coming back..Hmm, tell me more please?
OCD8mybrain,
Thank you for taking the time to comment on my blog..
Yes, this is true about what you stated I at times feel so emotionally left standing alone when he disconnects and it isn't his fault as you have said..However, something to consider as not changing??
Thank you once again for the advise much appreciated.