this is painful, i can barely type.  i wish someone would shoot me? i'm going to live with my mom because i'm staying at my girlfriend's parents house and i'm losing my mind? and i have been thinking about suicide, not trying to, but it's there all the time and i told her crying and she got pissed and i haven't talked to her since….and she broke up with me… because i want to live with my mom…because i don't feel comfortable living with5 other people and half my shit is down the road at the other housei was living at and my cat is still there and she hasnt even been talking to me and i miss my old life. and i think i'm 3 months pregnant. and i kinda wish i'd die in my sleep tonight =( and i'm so alone right now. and i know this is fucking stupid, but i'm so hurt right now i can't even explain, it's that horrible pain that hurts so bad…all i wanted was a hug and for her to tell me she loved me and didn't want me to die, but she obviously doesn't care much ,eh? but i do, i care about other people's feelings. so i guess honestly i should just lay here and deal with this pain because it's not worth it if the person i love doesn't even care that i am in her bedroom alone crying and wanting to kill myself because i fuckedup and lost my house and job and havent been able to accept that, and accept that my best friend died and that i had to pawn everything just to eat, and that i waited a month for her to get out of rehab…..it just shouldn't mattter should it…. because she doesn'tlove me. and it's funny because i must be the sickest cat in town man… for being such an idiot….lol i want to die, im sorry i keep putting it, but i'm being honest. it's like OCD right now like i feel so fucking alone. she's such a bitch lol what the hellllllllllll i'm out i'm going to sleep. peace