We me went I was 18, I thought I was in love. I was on cloud nine. After 9 years and 6 kids  I realized I was worth loves time. I’m not worth anyone’s time. For the last few months I’ve been reminded that “I’m not the one” I even hear “eww” in passing. I was told I have not ambition no pride and that the love of my life has moved on. I cant provide the normalcy he is looking for. I’ve been in mommy mode since I was 18. I don’t know how to be normal. I know how to be a mom. In turn his reply was “I’ve been tolerating you because of the kids” I’m crushed. My youth is gone, I have no friends (wasn’t allowed) , my family stop calling years ago because Mr.Aggression  thought my family were trying to separate us. I am alone and overwhelmed. Who is going to love me now? What do I have to look forward to? I’ve endured physical, emotional and financial abuse. I’m broke I give up. Why am I not worthy? What makes me unlovable. My mom doesn’t talk to me my grandmother used the word “hate” and a few other colorful words to describe me and my kids,my dad….absent. my siblings have their own lives and families they are all so happy I want to feel happiness too. I want to be loved