Hey everyone. I'm feeling very alone again. In fact I feel alone most of the time. I want to cry but I don't really have anyone to cry to. I can only call my mother so many times and my other friends aren't really empathetic at all in any way. My one friend who I could cry to is not really around much anymore since he got a new job and made new friends. I'm in my house alone with my fiance who just makes me feel so depressed. He has depression and supposedly D.I.D, according to his new therapist (who I made him see). He's so nasty all the time and he just walks around the house complaining about everything having to do with our lives together. He HATES HIS LIFE and I'm part of it! I've told him this, time and time again and he just says, "It's not about you." Well it is about me when he has an attitude with me or when he vocalizes how awful his life is and when he wonders "where he went wrong!?" He complains about the house, how he is losing his job and dosen't know where he will go next, money, our animals (2 cats and 2 dogs), money, money, and money. All he talks about is money and how we don't have enough. I wonder if he gives a shit about how that makes me feel. Apparantly not because I've told him that when all he complains about is how horrible our lives are because we don't have enough money, it wieghs on me…because I don't make much money at all. I'm an adjunct professor at 2 schools and I'm going to grad school which means I'm incurring more debt. I don't have a car right now, so I've been borrowing his. I know that this is all terrible and it gets me depressed too…but what's worse is that the one thing that uplifts me-our wedding and honeymoon in only 1 month-doesn't seem to matter to him at all. I ask him all the time and we've gotten into fights over this which is," You know, we're getting married at a nice place…we're getting married, does that not matter to you? Would you rather not? Is this wedding just an inconvinience?" He always rolls his eyes and tells me I'm ridicuous. Or he'll just go off on a tangent about how we need to improve our lives so that we're not in this position. I HATE IT…and I have almost no patience for it anymore. We've been fighting like crazy, and it kills me because I love him, but I feel like he wishes he were anyone but himself, like I don't matter, in fact, he may be thinking I just make his life worse. I'm so lost and depressed. I want to cry and sleep all day. I'm so lonely