I finally learned my lesson in helping others in that it gets me no where but burned. After two years of helping my friend through friends burning and using her, constant ER trips including a 3 day stay, making sure she had food and just overall helping her, and being there for her, living with her for about 6 mos, her thanks was kicking me out after she knew I couldnt store stuff that wasn't allowed in the shelter knowing if I went there, I'd lose the only items I have left from my deceased mother. She could have me a friend and asked me to leave yesterday when I was downtown at my friend's storing my stuff, which would have not caused the friendship and been the right way to do things but she decided to do it tonight. After I lost about two large trash bags of clothes moving in with her because I didn't pick them up within the two week time frame while she said we would. So now, here I am, heading back to the shelter tomorrow. Thankfully, I was able to make contact with that friend so I can store what I can not take in, at his place until I get on campus. Through this I have learned all too well, not to assist and support people over myself anymore. Not to bother with my word being good to most people because their's is not. I used to have a House M.D. perspective and I have found I will just go back to that, life was less complicated then. I ran out of meds two days ago, was waiting on meds to arrive at that apartment, thankfully I deffered them to the clinic I use so she doesn't get them. Most definitely because in Oct/Nov, she could have gotten me arrested by using my meds in a suicide attempt. Though I don't wish bad things on most people, however in her case, being a habitual liar, refusing to acknowledge her symptoms of bipolar and BPD and her burning me after all I've done for her, hopefully, in my opinion, she does find out that her heart defects have gotten worse and find there is nothing they can do for her in time. People like her, not existing would make honorable, decent folks better off…
End of rant
I cut her slack with the countless times she's asked me to leave then stay because she's "addicted" to having me in her life. I stood by her through all her lies, even of having cancer which 3 of my family have died from. I stood by her as people left her life because they simply didn't like me without getting to know me, and while "friends" used her and were only there for her when it was convienent for them. I stood by her everytime she got mad at me and let her calm down to talk it out, I stood by her when she left town on a 3 week trip I paid for while she left no food or litter for her cat – that she so loves and adores. I stood by her when she bought dvds and other crap instead of food for herself, by giving her my food stamps. I stood by her while everyone else saw how she was and knew it was a bad friendship to have. And in the end the thanks for all that support was you are useless to me now, so get out. I have no slack for users, liars, and dishonest people, but I stood by her through all that… in the end, I stood by her trying to get people to notice something was wrong, possibly with her heart – as she has hypoplastic left heart syndrome and double outlet right ventricle. Her thanks.. I don't need you anymore.. So my slack for her now, is getting everything a person like that deserves, dying alone, with no one because she pushed them away when it wasn't convienent for them to be in her life.