So last night the weirdest thing happened. I was feeling nauseated, and I have emetophobia. So then I started freaking out and felt like I was going to throw up. I was hyperventilating to try to calm my stomach. My arms got this super tingly feeling, and my hands just locked up so that I couldn't move them. I couldn't separate my fingers, and my heart was pounding. So I was just there hunched over on the floor like that until it passed. By the end of it even my wrist was bent and trying to straighten it just hurt.
I may have had slight anxiety attacks before, where my heart was pounding and I was breathing fast and may have been a bit shaky, but nothing like this. That was one of the weirdest things I've ever experienced, right up there with sleep paralysis (which never happened to me until last year or so. Weird.) Once I didn't feel like I was about to throw up and I could move my hands again, I was soo shaky. If I held my hands out, they were shaking so hard. I tried to call Mom so she could help calm me down, but of course it was about 5am, so she didn't answer. Then I went outside and paced the backyard. Finally after about half an hour the weird anxiety feeling subsided. It was like a weird feeling throughout my body that just went away. It was all very strange. And it was all cause I'm so horribly afraid of throwing up. Stupid phobia. I think my stomach feeling upset started it, then my anxiety made my stomach feel worse, and that made my anxiety worse. Now I'm too scared to eat cause I don't know what caused it, so I'm really hungry. D:
I hope this doesn't end up happening again. The last time I felt sick like that was over a year and a half ago. I was scared, but at least I didn't have a flippin panic attack over it. I wonder if it's just going to get worse until I freak out whenever I feel slightly nauseated. I called Mom again today cause I was feeling anxious about it, even though my stomach didn't feel that bad. I was afraid the anxiety would make it worse again. I should probably eat something, but…nope. :[
I know I get some social anxiety and such, but this panic stuff is freaky and scary! I'm not used to it. Why is it happening to me?