Just thinking out loud on the subject of friends.

 I have 1 friend. I have lots of others, but does it count if you\'ve not seen or been in contact with them for a few years? I guess not…

 My friend is getting on with his life which is great, and he\'s expecting a baby soon with his girl friend which is really nice. I\'m seeing him far less often now though, so I\'m alone every day. I\'m not moaning about it really I\'ve got used to it and it\'s what I think I want, but it can\'t be good long term.

 A number of years ago i had a large group of very good friends, but I left them when my anxiety and depression rapidly escalated. Obviously it\'s hard to mix with friends in places when you\'re constantly having anxiety attacks and feeling uncontrollably depressed…best just keep myself to myself and not bring anyone else down with me. 

I\'m feeling keen to get my own place, but I do wonder if this will just make my life even more lonely not having the parents and brother around to say the odd word to daily. I don\'t say alot to them. Just the odd short convo, and I can\'t remember the last time I\'ve been able to sit down in the same room as them and relax or talk. I tend to eat, work, chill, watch tv, sleep all in my bedroom.

 Not sure what the answer is to get my social life back. It\'s not like I\'m just sitting around doing nothing with my life though. I work in the day here doing my jobs, and get out for walks or cycles in the evening, or do a DJ set for online friends, or work on a new track. I guess I\'ve replaced my friends with hobbies; the ridiculous list of which you\'ll see in my profile!

 So, not really moaning or feeling depressed about this issue, just wanted to share my thoughts and my situation.

 Bye fornow! \"\"

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