I added this to my status update but adding it here too so more people can see.
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Hi Everyone,
I have been struggling quite a bit with my anxiety. I had a really tough time the last month and when I opened up to my friend that I was struggling and that she would be willing to talk about it. She did not really take initiative to talk. I told her that I was expecting she would contact me however no response. Then, I told her that I was expecting her to respond but she did not respond to that either so I assumed she stopped caring. I told her this but she didn’t seem super anxious to talk to me by call to resolve this issue between us and tall about the other stuff. She was just waiting for the next free time she has. She has no sense of urgency and it made me sad. She expects me to make the effort to let her know what she is going through but I am exhausted as it is. Sometimes I just want someone to come over and say you can lean on me. That’s what I would do. Anyways we talked and I mentioned that I felt you were doing your own thing that last month and I was kind of thinking you would drop what you are doing focus on me for a bit to talk about my problem. But then she says sometimes she needs her own personal space and that she was going through her own occasional moments in during that time. I was heartbroken, I immediately felt I was external to her life. I felt was asking too much when I was going through a crisis that I have to expect her to immediately make the effort to check in. I feel was interfering in her life. Even in the fun stuff we do, she feels the need to tell me “I have to first need to check to see if my family is gonna do something”. I haven’t hung out with her in forever and when I decide we should do this tonight, she puts in me last place. I mean I get family is her priority but why can’t everyone be a priority, that’s what I do. Anyway, that’s a long winded way to say, I just don’t feel connected with her at all.
Can anyone relate at all to what I am going through and/or have suggestions?
Thanks for your response. Honestly I feel the others I talk to are fairly cognizant to what I am dealing with and they are fairly concerned. They actually check-in with me regularly. She is the only one who doesn’t so this time when she asked how it was going, I told her everything specifically in the recent month and hoped she would have a good response. Didn’t work out that way. Now she is back to her normal ways, closed off and me being on the outside of her life.
And you know what, I also feel the same. I am way better to friends then they are to me. But I think there could still be someone out there for us, can’t stop searching that’s the thing. Only thing is, it is hard for me to accept current relationships are not working.
Thats not nice at all. i’ve had that happen to me alot of times and wonder why i have trust issues with people. And just saying this I’m always here for you if you need someone to talk to. cause i understand. I am a trust worthy person and i don’t go telling your personal bunisness to everyone. I’ve gone through depression, suicidal and anziety and pain mentally and hurt and i am still going through that stuff. So i understand. email me if you want to and my email is- becca162021@outlook.com
Thanks for your response Becca. That’s incredibly kind of you. I will certainly contact you when I get a chance.