I get an idea in my head and it won\'t go away. As I am so indecisive the thoughts don\'t go away because I never get to the yes/no part. Is anybody else so indecisive? I don\'t know if this is part of the anxiety I guess it is. I usually get annoyed and say to my boyfriend you decide please and he knows I\'ll get super stressed if he doesn\'t so he usually does.
Well this is no where near a big decision but I have been thinking about dying my hair blonde lol. I know it could be a disaster but I can\'t get it out of my head. My boyfriend wont decide this for me which is right ofc but aghhhhhh!!! It\'s not even a big deal, I\'m so stupid.
In other news, handed up my dissertation, had my last ever class :). I have one other assignment to worry about and exams. I know that I can do them but I probably won\'t think that way tomorrow :(. I hate this anxiety. I\'d love to be able to handle things without all the panic. Like worry is good I know but I just wish it wasn\'t so disproportionate to the problem :(.
I have my second appointment at the doctor tomorrow, I\'m terrified. The last time I went there I got really depressed and felt sick. I felt like he didn\'t take me seriously and also I felt stupid as I had to talk to a trainee gp before him and then them both together. If I can be brave tomorrow I\'m gonna try tell them I only want to talk to one person. I don\'t like talking to people as it is and it was hard enough to go in there and say all that stuff. I almost cried it was embarrassing and humiliating.
I\'m not sure what I want out of the visit, I guess I\'d like to see someone to talk to. The waiting lists are probably so long though for people on the medical card :(.
I hope that things work out and they probably will but I guess that\'ll never actually go into my head and into my thoughts.