So here I am almost 30 years old and I still haven’t had the courage to tell my family and friends the fact that I am gay. Sometimes I still am admitting it to myself. Honestly I have known for a very long time but I’ve never acted on it. Anytime someone would bring up relationships I would just play it off with some excuse as to why I wasn’t interested. I’m sure some people know the truth but I want to be able to let them all know someday. I just don’t want to lose all the people in my life that I love so much. The thing is I don’t want my love for them to keep outweighing my desire to be free. So much of my life has been about pleasing others and being the person that they and I thought I should be, but I am just so tired. I want to be me. I need to be me. I just want to breathe and feel what it’s like to really love someone like all my friends do. I would welcome any guidance from anyone who has been through this same situation. I’m at a point in my life where I can’t keep hiding this part of my life. I am just afraid of losing everything I have built for myself. I don’t want to make an awkward situation for myself, my co workers, my friends and most importantly my family. To be completely honest, making this blog post has taken a lot of courage that I didn’t think I had until now for some reason. So here I sit at 3 am asking for help and guidance from anyone out there reading this. Thank you in advance to anyone who is willing to help me.

9 Comments
  1. rain2018 1 week ago

    Tell yourself it’s OKAY. Your preference in relationships, love, and such doesn’t dictate who your are as a human being. Your not just gay but your all these other things like, for example, an awesome person who deserves to have what you want. Whether it be a woman or a man you like, you shouldn’t just let it control you.

    Because you are you, and that’s truer than true – Dr. Suess

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      jonathanl 1 week ago

      Yeah I don’t want that one thing to define me but it’s an aspect I am tired of hiding for sure. I am a good person (I think lol) and I know that won’t change even if people don’t accept my life. Thank you for your kind words.

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  2. bridgie101 1 week ago

    If you’re not in some terrifying clothed brethren type community where everyone prays the gay away, then nobody cares that you’re gay and what’s more, they all probably already know. It’s perfectly normal and it’s pretty hard to hide although everyone will pretend until you give them the go ahead. There’s nothing odd about it. You certainly don’t have to burn your soul on the funeral pyre of your happiness to avoid ‘upsetting’ anybody. Find your absolute best friend and come out to them, and watch the whole thing come down to size. You think it’s big because you’ve paid a high price for it. But it’s small. Don’t waste another week. This weekend, tell Friend no. 1. Or colleague. Whoever.

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      jonathanl 1 week ago

      I actually have told a close group of friends and yes they did already know but I just can’t find the way to tell my family. It’s the religious stigma that makes me scared cuz I don’t want to lose my grandparents. Thank you for your support though.

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  3. condemned 1 week ago

    Geez, if I could pick any sexual orientation other than what I got, I’d choose gay. Because for whatever reason I’ve just never gotten along well with women. Also, this is probably not a reliable statistic but all the gay men I’ve met have been really polite and good-natured. I can’t say that about every straight man I’ve met..

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  4. hopelessbeing 1 week ago

    one of my best friends throughout high school was gay. I never felt he chose this anymore than I chose to be heterosexual. I loved him for the person he was. nobody could make me laugh like he did and he had a sensitivity that is generally uncommon in the average man, making him a unique person I treasured.
    You are an individual and you have one life. I say you should tell those who love you the truth. not that its a simple thing to do, but you deserve to live your authentic life.
    I wish you well

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      jonathanl 1 week ago

      Thank you so much for the words of support! It is greatly appreciated.

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  5. Lones73 6 days ago

    Honey you have one life. You need to be true to yourself. At the end of the day you are the only one who can be you. If your family don’t accept you there’s nothing you can do to change that. You were ‘created’ to be you. For all the bias, that society still has, you are you. If your family don’t accept your friends still will. Don’t be afraid to be yourself❤️.

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