It’s not fun going from bright bright bright bright bright lights to complete darkness in a second. The black sheet has fallen back over me covering me in a bleak blackness. All hope and strength has been replaced by a morbid sinister game that i don’t really care to play. It’s a game called "Chasing death" My thoughts have flipped from what was thinking about the future to thinking about death, and how to acomplish the goal of death. I chase the noose because it feels the right thing to do, the only thing left to do and my only hope of escape. It gets tighter and tighter around my neck till i can no longer breathe. A part of me fears what death could bring therefore a part of me is held back from pulling on the noose to make it go even tighter. Although i’m sure if i continue on this rollercoaster i will one day pull it and let myself finally die and fade from this bizzare horror movie in which i live in. The demons eyes are watching and they’re very powerful, they have more power than any god or any soul. The look and burn holes in every inch of me, slowly drawing my soul away from myself to a deep abyss, a burning hell hole. Everything around me is tumbling and falling, their eyes are in the walls, inside of me. They’re ALL around me. They will one day consume me. Evertime i fall down here a part of me dies, and that part of me remains down here forever more. The rest of me fights and finds some light and for a while i’m on top of the ground, lights shining, my faverouite colours gleaming and dreams floating with ideas and hope, the hole is sealed over. Then CRASH! The ground cracks beneath me without warning and there i am falling. There is never a warning so i can’t prevent the catastrophe. I can’t stop the walls from falling, lord knows i’ve tried a million times. I cling so hard onto something, onto a part of that wall that still remains, but within a second a vortex is spinning beneath me pulling me down and now….now i sit in the emptiness and cry never ending tears choking on my own words and ideas. Contradicting myself over and over. I’m left stressed and pulling my own hair out, there are no words that could ever truly describe the force or the pain this brings. One day……I fear this will be the death of me..