Didn't get much sleep in the last few days. I keep on tossing and turning on my bed, my mind racing despite my eyes begging for release. Last night was the worst one. I ended up ditching my matress for the floor before getting back onto the bed.
Every morning, I'm exausted beyond beleif. It's normal that I would want more sleep, but it's just getting ridiculous now. The alarm goes off, I deactivate it, then I go back to sleep for another hour or so. Someone has to wake me up just so I won't be late for school. Let's just say I'm not a morning person.
It's not just sleep problems that are giving me a hard time. Several days ago, my sister went on another of her bullying streaks. What made it worse is that Daniel's now doing what she tells him to do. I snapped not only at her, but my baby brother as well. I just can't take it anymore. She treats me like I'm a joke. Maybe I'm not that great a source of family pride, but I just want everyone off my back.
Then my dad gets home and she starts acting like I'm the culprit, not letting her get any sleep. He ends up ripping the computer cord out while I was using it and tells me to go to bed. I can't because I want to kill my sister. So vivid was what I wanted to do to her that I ended up telling my mom to call the police so that I won't hurt her.
Why? Why did I want to protect her from my anger, when I can barely control it anymore? Why wouldn't my parents understand that there was something wrong with me? I just started bawling.
I don't know what I'm going to do. This is a new level of unstable for me. If it gets worse, I just hope that there's nobody next to me…