My life has gotten complicated, as I am learning more about myself I find that I am drifting further away from what I thought I wanted. That scares me because while I want to find true happiness and be my authentic self, I worry about what it is going to do to others around me. I am 31 years old and never told anyone, with the exception of one person. But I am tired of living a life that while I am happy in, I know I’m not as happy as I could be. I am afraid of losing those that I care about the most. It isn’t fair to the people in my life now, that I live a lie, that I continue on pretending to be something I’m not.
I wonder what my kids will think of me, I wonder what my family will think. I worry about how much it’ll hurt my now husband (I know, you don’t have to point it out).
I just want to be my truest self, and I don’t even know where to start, or even how to not worry about what everyone else wants and thinks and only worry about myself for a change.