I have a few questions that I wonder if others are feeling.  I cannot get up in the morning to go to work!  I mean I do get up most days, but it is extremely difficult, I just dont want to face the day, weekends and days off are not so bad!  My job is ok, not the best not the worst, I do have a lot of repsonsibility.

Once I get up and in the shower I feel better, so the obvious solution is to get up and hop in the shower, I know that, it is soooooooo easy but it is very difficlut to do.  Like I said I do do it most days, or i would not have a job.

I also worry about my impulse control sometimes, I suffer from anxiety as well, so sometimes I think I may do or say something inappropiate and/or harmful to myself.  I have never done anything like that and probably never would, as like most of us I need to be control of my feelings 24/7  LOL……..heaven forbid we let go.  🙂  Just putting this out there to see what others think, so respond if you would like, if not that is cool too. 

I also wish I could get off this freaking medicine.  I have been on it toooooo long.  I take 1.5 mg of ativan per day small dose probably not even doing anything at this point. I have been on that varying doses for almost 30 years….:)  I also take Wellbutrin, for about 4 years and cymbalta for about 1 year or so.  I tired cutting down on the cymbalta, it was pure hell, it is also expensive as shit.  I already reached my cap on my pharmacy insurance…..take care all and have an good day. 

 

5 Comments
  1. Ghostgirl 11 years ago

    I feel the exact same way. I have spent this entire summer telling myself, "Tomorrow, tomorrow will be better". I just can't seem to get myself up and out of the house. I don't want to. But if I were to bath, dry my hair, comb it out, put it up, and get moving, force myself to be active, I'd feel better. I just can't do it and continually put it off which makes me feel worse but that's a large part of the problem isn't it?  You know that being active would make you feel at least a little bit better but when you first wake up, you really don't want to do anything and it takes really forcing yourself to get moving. =/

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  2. snowdreamer 11 years ago

    Welcome to DT….I can relate to just about everything you said…it's so hard for me to get up in the morning, go some place or do something that needs to be done.  The depression takes it's toll on you by making you exhausted and feeling like you aren't totally human.

    Try coming into chat and talk…if you don't want to talk in the lounge you can always go to another room or the need help room where someone will come in to talk to you.  All the people there suffer from some level of depression and other things as well but we talk about silly thing sometimes just to get our minds off how we are feeling so don't let that scare you away ok?  I'm in there every night if you'd like to talk I'm a good listener 🙂

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  3. orrme31 11 years ago

    thanks so much for your response.  I really appreciate it and hope to talk to you soon!

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  4. orrme31 11 years ago

    7:17comment was to snowdreamer.:)  but I appreciate all.

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  5. orrme31 11 years ago

    Thanks for the comment, I am going to see my Dr on August 2.  I do think that I immune from the dosage, I ve been taking it so long  I would have to be.  I have tried to get off it before and was not successful, even now when I forget to take it, I get some anxiety before I know that I forgot to take it, if you know what I mean.  I believe it is a psychological dependence at thhis point.  I think you are 100% correct in that my body is telling me consider going off the ativan, and that is what has me thinking about it.  I hope I am successfull.  Thanks very much for your interest and insight and i will keep you posted!  🙂

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