I think of myself as a pretty friendly person, being so I made a lot of friends. I can’t count them all, but when I got depression and anxiety, I couldn’t tell or express how I was feeling daily, no one wanted to listen, gradually everyone stopped talking to me and texting me. I did have one best friend, we would hangout all the time, we would stay over each others houses for up to a week. we had a really strong bond, and then his older brother and sister convinced him to start smoking weed and drink alcohol, that was all he wanted to do. He became really harsh and whenever I said something he didn’t like, he would threaten to punch me in the face..

One night me and 2 other friend’s took him to our local park where we always hung out, and I expressed to him that I didn’t like how he treated me. He instantly got angry and swore at me and said hurtful thing’s and then left. Later that night, I sat on the edge of my bed, and cried. I can’t stand arguing with people and something hurtful can hurt me, guess you can say i’m sensitive. We stopped talking and I had no one really to be my friend.

I’ve always wanted a friend that I could confide to, tell them all my fears and problems, someone that understands me. All through middle school I was so insecure because I hate way I look, I have a fast metabolism so I never really gained too much weight but i’m okay with my weight. I’ve lost basically almost all of my friends and they don’t think to text me, even though I helped most of them when they were down.

my current circle of friends like to be rough, mess around with boxing gloves and wrestle. I’m more of the nerd/geeky type of guy, they try to force me to do it but I just the other cheek. I do have a group of friends online, on playstation 4. I guess i’m looking for a best friend. I’ve had friends that were girls and they were really cool, they were very understanding, but again they left. I lost absolutely all the drive I had for school, I love to learn about animals, science and space.

but again. no one to talk to. no one to talk about thoughts to. and no one to be there for, no one to be there for me.

1 Comment
  1. emotions 3 years ago

    You tend to realise as you get older that people are less and less around when they are needed the most. Many persons with anxiety and depression will tell you that, it is in the moments of despair, that you tend to be the most alone. That’s because you are not yourself and need people who,can understand.

    I’m sorry if you feel alone. It’s not one of the best feelings in the world. But I have experienced the same. The online community can help and support here. There will be persons who not only listen but who actually understand what you are feeling.

    Drop a line whenever you fell you need to talk

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    0 kudos

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