Man I miss that mood I was in last week, everything was great, life was great. But now for the past two days I've been in a shitty mood and everything sucks. I think just knowing how good I felt makes feeling shitty even shittier. We have no money, no food really, and everything financially is at a halt. It's killing me inside, I've never been this broke. On top of all that I just got a note from my internet provider that weve reached our limit and they're going to charge more. What a nice thing to find when your broke. Got two notice from electric and heating, my bills are going up. What a nice thing to see when you're broke. Also got a note from my credit card provider, they won't increase my limit, although in the 10 years I've been with them I've never requested an increase, and even my request was only $100 increase, so that we could buy some groceries. I think life in America was designed to bring you down and keep you down, unless your rich or super intelligent, something I'm obviously not. I can't help but contaminate my whole household with my shitty mood, and now on a snow day I've been praying for and finally got, no ones happy, not me, not my daughter, and surely not my husband, it's days like this I wish I could just disappear, I don't like making everyone else mad and sad too. Tired of crying about things I can't control, wish I could control anything, at least the finances of my household or my feelings. The piece of shit medicine my dr. Prescribed sucks and ever since he switched my medicine, I've been on a roller coaster of emotions, I'd ask for a different prescription or higher dosage if I had enough money to even schedule an appt, and my dr. Wasn't so intimidating and my anxiety about it all wasn't so bad.

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