Thank you, friends, for your comments on my son’s acne Doctor appointment dilemma I blogged about this morning.  However, I feel compelled to respond to tribe member, Skwerl, and his comments to me that are typical of many people who "don’t understand" OCD/ anxiety disorders.  I don’t know what to think of his comments–hence, my mood of "other."      Skwerl, you made comments related to my apparent "allowing him to skip school",  "enabling him," and "allowing the OCD claws to grip tighter"  when he stayed home because of anxiety/related to his acne this week.  Dear sir.  He is almost 16 years old and weighs almost as much as me.  Trust me when I say, we have battled OCD before in 4th grade and then more recently, since July of 2007 following a death in the family and I am NOT enabling him.

In fourth grade (prior to any meds), when his first episode of severe OCD hit, he exhibited school anxiety/school refusal and ADD (undiagnosed at that time).   I resorted to begging, cajoling, crying, pleading, yelling, threatening, removed TV/video priviliges, and yes, full-on carry out physically against his will.       The vivid memory includes my then 14 year old helping carry out his younger brother–each of us under one of his armpits carrying him outside with his legs kicking and bicycling as if on "a marathon"–to my waiting van.  It was complete with my boot pushing his backside just inside the door out of the way of the van door shutting–with him yelling and crying.   That was prior to Adderall and Prozac.   This is a brain/chemical imbalance.  Not a parenting flaw–atleast in this case.  Yes, he has been to two Psychologists, two Psychiatrists, a two-week outpatient program for Adolescent Teens at a Behavioral health clinic, and even two Naturopathic Doctors. 

I come from a rather strict upbringing (my husband, NOT)–and I have been the structured parenting leader in our home.   I do not enable–I assure you.  It is as ridiculous to say I am allowing him to skip school as it would be to say another parent is just "allowing their OCD child to wash their hands too frequently" like it’s there fault.  Skwerl.  You’re killing me!  I sort of expect that from acquaintenances or people who know NOTHING of OCD, not from an OCD sufferer.   If it were only that easy–to just tell him in NO UNCERTAIN TERMS to just get his "A** out to the car and got to school."   Hey, I forgive you, though.   Because actually, a close familymember really said that to me last fall when he couldn’t make it through a whole school day.  I ended up withdrawing him from school and homeschooling him the rest of 8th grade (which he hated). Of course. He missed being "normal" and missed his friends. 

The good news, Skwerl (and other OCD tribe friends), is that LENS Neurofeedback got my son closer to the outskirts of the OCD "eye of the storm."  He has only missed 8 days total (the last day being two days ago) due to "acne" anxiety.    Thus, my friends, my recent panic and subsequent blog.    I apologize, my friends, if I come across harsh and defensive, but it has been a h*** of a battle this past year and a half and I am tired of feeling part to blame.   I am not perfect, I have made mistakes.   However, I have done more than most mothers to help him fight the beast and get out of "OCD Country."   Hey, we have traveled the OCD city center. And I am in the "burbs" moving to the outer countryside, looking to scale the prison fence with my son on my back if I have to.  That is why I am WARRIORMOM.



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