Like a symptom of some inept disease

or a fotten fig hanging from a tree

somehow my relase has turned into a restraint

I am seeking for words to express my shock

what comes out is a hopeless spraying of words

                with less meaning than intent

I am speaking darkness out to free the space

feelings always get in the way

awkward reasoning

        always trying to make sure the point has been made




                      lost in thought

feelings erase thought

                     being erases seeing

               anger erases everything

and it begins again

        with lost grips and

                   sinking feelings

            only to wake up not human again

                      only to be swallowed up in the

                    sea of my despair

                              angry and alone as always

                interminable periods of lost thoughts

eaten up by the holes in my memory

                              Traumatic Emotion

   explosive revulsion

                        only deep down

   the child begins screaming again

            HELP ME!!!   HELP ME!!!

Its like a cycle of destructive despair rolled into naked confessions

                          with moments of levity and a period of  immense


1 Comment
  1. chuck1957 14 years ago

    im sorry brokenheart have a good day today its a nice new day, try to remember in the snap of your fingers things change give yourself credit for what you can do. And try to think of those things during your bad days, we have more control then you think, I try very hard with this junk we have to keep my sence of humor a possitive attitude and my faith I know it is very hard at times. Hold up your head and be proud of what you can and do do. we can be our own worse enemay at times you get off to a bad start, Just start over i know it sounds easier but im a 45 year survivor of this junk everyday is a battle. but they get easier..

    DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP MY FRIEND KEEP plugging around the blocks you well do it. i see a lot of possitve stuff in you YOU just have to learn to use the tools we have inside… have a great weekend my friend chuck


    0 kudos

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