Well as you know now, my name is Tessa. I have been on here before but was never really able to get into it. I've been writing alot lately so I'm giving it a try. Recently I've been struggling with panic attacks and anxiety. They have been really bad, I always had a few like once a year. Lately though, for the past week they happen every night. Right before I got to sleep I have one and then can't sleep. It's bullshit. I've delt with worse. They are irrational fears and I wish they would just go away.

My boyfriend wont reply to my texts, wont answer my calls and we havn't talked since our last day together in person. So stupid, why do men never text or call. It's like they want you to go crazy thinking about what they are doing, why they are ignoring you and most of all, who the hell are they with that takes up all their time. It makes me paranoid because I know he always has his phone with him and always replies and answers other peoples calls. Lest when I was around him for four or five days he was. Uhg anyways,,,

My mother is angry with me because I called her a drunk, while she was drunk. I know she hates it but I hate when she talks crap about my family so I guess she went to bed even with me. I recently introduced my sister to this site. It upsets me that she needs something like this but it should help a little, it does me. If you read this, I love you and I am sorry you have to go through this.

Ehhhh What else to say. If I told you about my life you would think I'm lying hahah. It's pretty upsetting stuff. I'll gain some bravery and share a whole bunch though.. Just give me time. For now I guess it's fairwell.

1 Comment
  1. Brokenwings7 9 years ago

    I hate panic and anxiety attacks I've had them before and at night as well. I usually have a picture of a place I wish to be an a song that helps me relax and I stare at that picture and listen to my song to help me focus on something else to help the moment pass. And I won't lie I even have a little blanket and a Teddy bear my father gave me when I was young. I'm 31 now but those have always brought me comfort. Lol but they remind me that I've had good moments and that I will be ok. Try to shift your focus on something that makes you happy, so those moments when panic attacks come they will pass by a little better. And as far as boyfriends I'm sorry he isn't there when you need him. Believe me my life was never easy, and it hasn't gotten better but my hardships have taught me a lot and made me stronger. I've learned to never give up and that it is up to me to make myself happy. I just hold on to those things that will be of a positive outcome for me. Keep writing as well, that also helps 🙂 Good luck & take care.

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