Hi. My name's Adrian, but prefer AJ. I'm 20 years old & stay in South Africa. I've been a member on DT before, but have/had a habbit of disappearing… I think I've hit emotional/mental rockbottom. Long story short – I'm 20. I have no job. No experience.No friends. I never matriculated. I have a daughter I've never met, but that's a whole other story… And I live with my mother, father & 13 year old brother in a 2 bedroom flat that's pretty much a slum. All cards on the table – I'm a wreck. I don't even know where to start… My parents put a roof over my head & food in my stomach, but that's about it. I consider myself alone. I have not a single friend & my parents provide no emotional support or advice at all. I doubt they even care. I have to take whatever life throws at me by myself. Atleast that's how I feel… Besides being alone, I suffer from mild OCD, Bi-Polar, stress & anxiety. I think. I don't know what determines what anymore… Anyways… What is to become of my pathetic life? I have nothing & can't seem to gain anything. Life is hard in this country… There's no support groups of any kind. And those there are don't come cheap… It's all about money here… Nobody seems to care aboutanything at all if there isn't a huge reward for them somewhere along the line… But I'll get to these other things another time. For now, I just feel rather hopeless & broken. I doubt that's ever gonna change either. I'm a miserable, morbid, dark hearted person. I've grown such a hatred for this world & life in general that I don't know anymore… My life never used to be this way… When I think back, I had a near perfect life. Then between my bad descisions/mistakes, PEOPLE & this world – I lost everything. Includingmyself…

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