Another night I went to bed alone while he stayed on the computer. I asked him if he was going to be going to bed anytime soon at 9pm, he said that he was going to be really soon, woke up at 10:30pm, he was still on, so I asked him again, he said that he was signing off right then and there…waited until now 11pm, I asked him if it takes 30 minutes to sign off, he wasn't even listening. He asked me what I said, I just told him to forget it. I've talked to him about this too many times to count, and a few days ago I sat down and talked to him like an adult, he changed for about 2 days, probably less then that.

Today it angered me so much. His family was going to go bowling, I didn't want to go, but his mom asked and before I even answered he told his mom that I was going, but that he was staying. He didn't even let me say if I wanted to go or not. I don't know why, but it just enraged me. HIS family was going out somewhere and had asked ME if I wanted to go. They didn't ask him if I wanted to go, they asked me. And it wasn't my family that was going, it was his family. So needless to say I got dressed and he wanted to know why I was mad at him. So I told him in very harsh words that it was HIS family going bowling and I should be the one to say weither or not I want to go, he doesn't have any right to volunteer me for stuff I don't want to do. Then he said "Oh, well I can just tell them that you changed your mind." that got me even more mad, because I hadn't changed my mind, I never wanted to go in the first place. So I said a few harsh words and slammed the door behind me.

Everyone was outside and we were ready to go, and then everyone started asking me where he was. I was so p*ssed off at that point that I straight up told them "He would rather spend all day on his computer chatting with girls, so he made me come with you guys instead." Then his grandma gave me kind of a funny look, kind of like 'aren't you going to do something about it?' so I just told her "It's not my problem." The thing is, I think everyone knew how fed up I was, everyone saw the truth of things. All this time I had put up a facade that everything was ok with us and that if there were any problems then he made it look as though it was my fault, and I let him do that. Because he's their son, I think it would be horrible for parents so loving and kind to see their eldest son treat someone like that, especially the woman that he says he loves and that the whole family loves.

I don't know if today what I did was a bad thing, but I let them into what was really going on. Ya, I know that I have problems, but he put his computer and little groupies before his family and me. So ya…his dad went up to our room first and we could hear the yelling from outside, then after 15 miutes his uncle went upstairs and then he finally came down after 5 minutes. Then the entire time out with his family he was showing me attention and affection. And he was being his old self, the person that I fell in love with, the person that he was like in the begining of the relationship. So ya…that was my day.

But once we got home he went right back to how he was before, spending all of his time with his computer and internet. But to be honest, I really don't care right now, The only thing that I care about is how this is affecting my sleep, is that bad that's the only thing I care about right now? lol who gives a sh*t, I'm just so bored and fed up with this cr*p.

1 Comment
  1. emotions 10 years ago

    No you are not wrong at all.

    Mine started with simple things like that, then went on to neglecting phone calls, standing me up when we had to go out. Then little by little I was totally insignificant. I feel it. I left.

    And you know what, yes we are the ones who will do what it takes, do what is necessary,a nd make the necessary change for the good. But what do we receive in return? false promises? a one or two day change? is that all we are worth?

    I brok it off just a few days ago. It hurts, it really does, but u know what, I tell myself that this hurt will go, staying meant minding the hurt.

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