Nope I am not sure if I was ready for this, are we ever?  I have made some choices lately that have been just that, Choices and they were MINE…so in saying that the end results were mine as well.  I would be lying if I said this doesnt hurt becasue it kinda does.  wanting to be wrong was something that for once would have been a good thing but no…I was right…This morning I decided that things were askew and needed to be righted…I sent her on her way to figure things out…it really wasnt that hard for me to see how confusing it had all become…How everything was heading to a bad place. just like I have done a million times over.  But this was different…I knew everything I could have done, the opportunity was there and I just let it pass but not before I planted the seeds…It was not until this afternoon that she went back to last night and started talking about what I had said…I close the door on yesterdays pretty hard…but damn…I had her…at that point I realized I had sucked her in…and I could get her to do whatever I wanted…So being that I am not like that anymore I asked her to go…Go and follow her heart which truly was not with me…I think that took a lot more than the easy route which would have been to perpetuate this so called relationship of potential manipulation and hurt with the opportunity to break a heart even.  Between classes and everyting else I am exhausted…So my little lady is gone…not sure if she will be back…I do like her so much…I try to remind people at the end of a day, I am still Mike and I am still an Addict…all of that is still inside me…I just use it a little differently now…I am proud of me for having her leave…Instead of the alternative…Life is still good..that had not changed…


My Love to all of you…Good Night my tribe…Michael…



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