Even though the alarm clock wasn't set to go off this morning, I awoke promptly at 8:30 to the sound of birds. It's a good feeling to know that most of us have made it through another winter and have yet another chance at life. I have been spending a lot of time in the last two weeks, prepping the yard and the garden for spring..All the work I did in the fall; the planting of bulbs, soil preperation etc., had paid off, and the front of the house is a riot of color. The Daffodils and Hyacinths have done their thing ;the Tulips hitting their peak. The  Irises are sending up dozens and dozens of bloom stalks and in  another week or so they should be in full bloom…The front steps are another labor of love, lined with bright pots full of Petunias which should last well through the summer. Soon it will be time to plant the summer flowers!

For the past two years, I have found very little peace in my heart. The family dramas, losing several friends to hiv, alcohol, and drugs and and dealing with my own personal demons have taken an emotional toll. Most of the peace I've found has been tending my gardens. It makes me feel close to my grandmother who has been gone qutie a long time and also to my father who loved gardening in his rare leisure time.

It also makes me think of my friends I have made here on the Tribe. Whether I'm hauling bags of manure and compost or clipping flowers and primping the flower garden, my thoughts are often with you my friends. My partner works very hard and long hours and my thoughts of you are some of the things that have gotten me though the lonely times.

There is a little corner of the front garden where I have a little stone Angel. She sits on the ground with her face buried in her hands. I used to imagine that she was crying. But lately I think that she is only playing a game, hiding her face untill the full beauty of Spring is revealed. I planted some tiny red tulips around her and this spot has become an unofficial memorial to Nancy (LadyInTheBack) and all of the wonderful people here on the Tribe. It's strange and kind of wonderful that this little angel is so reminiscent of Nancys logo that still pops up nearly evey day on her prolific polls!

This then, is my tribute to you my friends and the continuing message of hope and renewal. Remember : the angel isn't crying!

Much Love, Loki  (aka david)

1 Comment
  1. Louie 14 years ago

    What a beautiful photo of your garden.  Living in an apartment, I had hyacinths and tulips for about a week until they finished blooming in their little pots.  (I’m donating them to a friend who lives out in the country and can give them a decent spot in the ground.)

    Ever since my diagnosis, and more recently since I came to terms with my conditions, I’ve learned to look at the simple things in our busy lives in admiration.  Today I was mesmerized by a tree dancing as the wind coursed through its leaves and branches.  I had no thoughts, I had no desires, I had no reason to be unhappy.  All I felt when I saw that big beautiful tree dancing in the wind was joy and happiness.  I’d never stopped to really look at a tree before, much less one as animated as today’s tree. 

    The simple things in our lives are the real gifts we forget about too quickly.  When you get hit in the face with the solemn diagnosis that you’re not really going to live forever, those simple things are a treasure unto themselves.

    Thanks for your post, Loki.

    -Louie

     

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