Today K texted me. He is being cyberbullied again. And I found out it was by the same girl who bullied me on line last year. She knows K and for some reason thinks she owns him. In Dec 2011, I dedicated a song to K on FB. I wrote out his full name (including his middle name) and said I miss and love him and this song is dedicated to him (I was drinking) Then the girl made a nasty comment. "Are you fucking crazy, bitch? He doesn't want you!!" She went on to tourment me. I deleted her, tearfully, figuring she was someone who was either seeing K or a friend of his girlfriends.
Well all year this same girl has been harrassing K online, on the phone, anywhere she can get to him. He says they never dated! They were just friends and she went completely psycho on him. Every time she would pick on him, he'd text me to rant and vent and seek support… ironically she is the very reason that I ended up seeing K again after 5 years. She drove him to seek out the one person who loves him unconditionally: ME.
When I found out it was the same person, I wasn't shocked, but it was disturbing… I know that she must like K. Love him, perhaps and feel that he has rejected her. Otherwise she would not hate him so much. I remember hating K after he dumped me. I was wanting to bad mouth him to anyone I could on line. Then I got over that and realized my love for him was such that I'd rather be his friend than his enemy. I became loving and caring and a support to him… I just felt that was the right thing to do rather than being angry forever. And in return, I got his friendship.
But I know I will always have to be over shadowed by the fact that K doesn't want me. It's true. Just today he was saying that he wants to get rid of this girl because if he meets someone he likes, he doesn't want her talking to them. That hurt.
And I'm tired of it. I just don't want to obsess anymore. I want to be set free. K likes me as a friend, but obviously does not like me as anything more. So I need to just accept that. Even if I don't "move on" I have to accept it.
