I’ve done some pretty amazing things. Pretty amazing things for someone who’s completely normal. Even more remarkable for someone who has major depression. So why does no one take me seriously? I don’t understand. Maybe it’s my lack of confidence. But I don’t think that’s fair. They know about my major depression. They should know that that means I technically should not be functioning at all. But I am not only functioning.

 –     I have run an online social networking community for over 6 years starting when I was still in school encouraging teens & college students to remain pure (PurityPeople.com). At one time, we had over 800 members. I just need to find the time to email all of them to get them back. Major book authors have recognized it, written me, and some have even included links to their site. BarlowGirl (the Christian band) recognized the site and let me interview them for it, and I got to meet them in person because of it. I have been doing all of the content updates, editing, tech support, and site building all these years, primarily by myself.

–    Since highschool I have been involved in marketing sorts of positions…starting with doing advertising for a custom home building company senior year, design work throughout college, and a marketing internship my senior year of college for a tourism company.

 –    I currently work two jobs; a full-time job for a major, international Christian non-profit, and a part-time job at a portrait studio.  

I mention all of this only because currently, I am frustrated. I am frustrated because I feel like I am being held back in my full-time job. I work in the Web & Interactive department. I have shown my boss over and over again that I am interested in Social Media Marketing (marketing for Facebook and MySpace) by showing him the site that I’ve done myself from scratch for the last 6 years, by creating RSS widgets and banner ads to be used on both MySpace and Facebook. I’ve come up with ideas for helping us do viral marketing and grassroots marketing campaigns. All of the ideas were completely innovative, came from my head only, and done completely on my own initiative since none of these things are in my job description. 

So why am I frustrated? I’m frustrated, because I’m finding myself back in the position I was 2 years ago…sliding down down down to the position of a mere administrative assistant. Granted, my salary is just as high as if I was actually doing degreed work. But the thing is, I have a degree. And I don’t want to be doing the stuff I do (copy & pasting copy onto our .com) for the rest of my life. I am so bored with it, it’s not my passion. I have made it obviously clear to my boss that my passion lies in Social Media not only through the examples above but going and speaking to him about the possibility of doing that more on a full-time basis. But who do they hire instead? A girl. A recent college grad, who has no experience whatsoever in social media, other than the fact that she has a Facebook account. Which, if you wanted to go on that alone as the qualification, I’ve had a Facebook account since they first opened it to colleges outside of Harvard in 2004. She just graduated, which means she can’t have been on Facebook longer than me as she would’ve been too young when it first started. But anyway, they’re only hiring her because she has a Marketing degree.  

Ok, I’m sorry, but a degree in Marketing should not be the only requirement. I mean HELLO, I’m sitting right in front of your face. I’ve proven over these last 2 years of employment with you that I’m interested in this stuff. I’ve gone out of my way to do stuff for you. I’ve been working in Marketing-related positions for over 8 years now. I’ve run my own social networking site for 6 years. So what my degree is in Communications instead of Marketing. BIG DEAL. 

For whatever reason, my boss has just decided he doesn’t like me anymore. Last year at my yearly reviews, I got terrible reviews, despite the fact that I knew I had done some pretty great things. And I was such a self-defeatist. Instead of sticking up for myself by mentioning the positive things I’d done, I just took it. And I should’ve quit at the time and found something new to do before I got into this dead-end position I’m in now (created because we did a re-org at my company and so my job changed to make a long story short).  I know what I need to do. I need to leave my company. Because the only position within it that I’d be interested in, they’ve just decided to give to an intern. And come August, when her internship is up, they’ll hire her on full-time. In the meantime, I’ll have been here for 2 years with all that experience and been overlooked. I just don’t think I can handle it. My boss dislikes me and doesn’t take me seriously so I need to leave while I still can, while I’m not just “let go” for whatever reason they can think of. The problem is, where do I go? Social Media Marketing is a completely new field and I don’t want to leave Colorado…but I doubt anyone else is even delving into this realm. So, alas, I am stuck. Again.