Since my life has been nuked, everything around me is dead or dying. I don’t have any friends or family or church or god to look for help.  They were nuked along with my life.  My mom kicked me out of the house cuz she thought I may be bi or lesbian…just because I told my now ex b/f that there was a girl I thought was pretty and I would make out with her and because I was sexting with my b/f.  Never did sex, but that didn’t matter.

She reported me as a run away so no one is looking for me, no one cares.  I’ve been homeless now like 7 months.  I finally got tired of digging through trash cans for food and begging so I finally turned to selling myself.  The first few times were horrible but like anything, you get used to it.  Then the rapes, but again, you get used to it.  What still hurts and pisses me off is how the cops treated me.  I’m homeless trash, no real crime or people involved.  Everything they did to me, the cop turned it around to be my fault, I wanted it, I probably even liked it.

After a few suicide attempts, I finally gave up on those, the last time got me 6 days in the psych unit.

I sometimes will check facebook to see what all my old friends are doing and its like I never existed.  My ex b/f, the fucker who started all this is talking all about going to the prom but not sure who to take and how happy he is, going to be starting college after his mission.  Everyone has a life but me, life is standing still and everything I do to make things better, end up making it worse.  Even if I could get a real job, how do I say I’m 16, homeless and a prostitute?

2 Comments
  1. Author
    beccasweet 4 years ago

    I’m planning on leaving…I have a job thing this friday. If it works out, then things will be good. if it doesn’t…then I’m off to arizona, then maybe mississippi, a friend is there who said he would help.

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  2. rabbitmind306 4 years ago

    This is your chance to learn how to grow and thrive beyond everything and everyone you’ve ever known.. you are so young, don’t underestimate how much capability you have to shape yourself as your own powerful individual. Never put yourself on the line for others approval – people will stand with you if they genuinely want to – NOT ask you to degrade yourself or go against your own values for their support.
    Life isn’t easy. Not for anyone. Just try to find something that truly empowers you, gives you the will to move forward despite the hell you face.

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