Okay well I may as well introduce myself then… just joined. Mary. 16 years old. And above all my issues (trust me there are a few) I am absolutly terrified to be touched. In any way, by any person; it just scares me silly. Why? I won't go into the details, I mean hey I don't know any of you, but it wasn't nice and it happened when I was very young, you get the jist. So since then if anyone gets physically close to me, even if it is a stranger on a crowded bus/ train, I shiver, get dizzy, feel sick, loose breath and sometimes even throw up, or pass out or if its really bad have a panic attack. Until now it hasn't affected my life THAT badly, and no one has had the occasion where they would notice how undeniably weird I was being. However, like I said I am 16. For the past year or so I have been expected socially to go out, attend parties and have a life of me own, not one where I am at home on New Years Eve eating ice cream and crying as I watch Titanic and talk to people I do not know about my problems. I can't go to parties. I can't bear them. I mean, I love having fun, but they are always packed. The last time I attended a party I had a panic attack, right there. Bid of a shock to the guy who was chatting me up, I'll tell you that much. I don't know what I am supposed to do anymore. Anyone gets within arms length of me, especially guys, and I… well I try to run as far as I can. And if I can't? The party incident was minor. You get the idea… does anyone have any idea of how I can get past this? Even a little? Cus I sure don't. One of my friends tried to ease me into being touched. I ended up passing out. Twice. Help?

Ps thanks for reading the speech, I understand it's kind of an essay but if anything helps its venting, right?

  1. ar310 9 years ago

    hi, congrads on your first blog!
    im sorry to hear what you have to deal with, and your past problems which have caused this, but it\'s brave of you to write about it.
    i tend to avoid parties because i tend to get panic attacks when im surrounded by a load of people moving around in a room; like i can\'t control anything, and my breathing goes crazy.
    If you haven\'t had any therapy, i\'d recommend talking to your GP or hunting down some Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Its helped me to get out more and attempt to socialize, and change how I think and react to everyday situations.
    Hope this helps, keep talking, you\'re not alone 🙂

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  2. ughreally 9 years ago

    Venting is good. Just writing it down helps. At least it does for me. I\'m so sorry that happened to you. I wish I had better advice. But that is what we are all here for…to put our anxieties out there and get some support. Happy New Year Mary!

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  3. coolbeans 9 years ago

    I have a very similar problem and my advice would be to take it slow. As others suggested, you might try having someone you completely trust touch you in safe areas for a very brief amount of time, like a couple of seconds. Don\'t overdo it though. Keep increasing the time and eventually see if you can get to the phase where you can hug someone you trust. Just remember that as a defense mechanism your fear of being touched is designed to keep you safe. In that regard it\'s a good thing, you don\'t need to be touched by everyone, but you do want to get to the point (I am assuming) where it doesn\'t interfere with your normal life such as going to social gatherings etc.

    Just remember to take it slow and be patient with yourself, this is going to take a long time most likely and you may never get to the point where you are totally comfortable with physical contact. You might want to look into a workbook called the Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Bourne. It might be a good place to start getting basic information and start working on some exercises. Of course, if you can find a way CBT is going to be your best option. Hang in there and take care of yourself.

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