first off i want to take a moment and say thank you to all the people on this site for being so supportive especially halogen25. it really helps me sooo much to communicate with other people that can relate. today i sat through my first panic attack without reachin for the meds…which was hard to say the least! i mean it wasn't as bad cuz i'm on medicine for my general anxiety, but it wasn't the easiest to just to let it happen. it was quite unnatural to think of it, but after i had this new found confidence in my head. like if i can make it through one of these maybe just maybe i might be able to go back to school. i want to thank you guys for commentin on my blogs it means a lot to me to have other people's opinoin's. and that's how i kinda got the idea to try goin back to school. if i go back and fail at least i can say i tried and won't regret anythin. it's gunna be hard, but i'm lucky to have support from my friends and you guys. the other thing is i've learned that anxiety is kind of a blessin in disguise almost. we can all say at one time in our lives that we have struggled with anxiety or are strugglin and made or make it through, where as some people could never relate to all the hardships we have been through. that is what connects us. it makes us different then other people and at the same time it makes us the same. i've almost found that havin anxiety has made me a more creative and thoughtful person. i think about everythin before i follow through. i think about what i do and how it effects the people around me. i think that one day hopefully with gods help and all the stuff i've learned through this website that i can use my anxiety as a way to channel anythin that comes my way.