I Walk through this episode of guilt with the thought of eternal loneliness. As I slowly make my way to the next street corner I feel dead weight go down with each and every footstep. A heavy thump with every breath…



Ahead I see the dimly lit lamp post standing so majestically in the darkness…

Waiting for my arrival…



My only hope is that this cold steel could somehow be my salvation from this life of deception and disgrace.
I notice no steady mummer of life around me…. no cars passing in this silent city. I see no people or creatures of the night. I look up to the cloaked buildings surrounding me…darkness lingers in every window.



I am getting closer now…



I feel the light pierce my eyes like venomous fangs striking me from above. Standing in this perfect circle of light I see nothing of the outside world. Nothing else matters. I wait quietly for a sign…
Silence and darkness all around me somehow eases my nerves as I stare down at the weather beaten and cracked concrete beneath my feet. So cold the elements are in this world that encircles me tonight. I watch my breath in disappearing clouds of lifeless spirits evaporate in the dead of night. Time seems to stand still as I wait. Lifetimes pass me by in unflinching majesty as I patiently await my guest.



I hear faint steps in the background of this grim scenery. They are slow and paced but almost fearful and hesitant at the same time. I stare out into the darkness in search for the arriving presence.



Suddenly I see him. Dark and mysterious in appearance as he glares at me with his deep brown eyes. I immediately notice the brown orbs of sympathy holding in tears that seem to muffle the nobility hes trying so hard to maintain. Almost instantaneously I feel a pang of heavy guilt hit me like a bullet…



…



We give one another a sincere nod of approval. I can see the tears clearly now….Streaming down his cheeks like overflown cups of water. He takes his eyes away…never again looking in my direction…I brace myself… close my eyes and remain calm in tranquility and everlasting patience…



Everything is in slow motion now….



I feel a slice into my abdomen …a horrible sensation tearing through my body inch by inch ripping through my organs…then finally releasing itself from my back…



I open my eyes and suddenly the world seems so animated…
I see him now….
Holding the gun at my chest….



Hes screaming out to me.. I cant hear him.
I cant hear him but I can see his pain…

I fall to the concrete…

The puddle of blood warms my chilled cheeks…its almost comforting.



I can suddenly see eyes….all around me standing outside the circle of light… judging me…

Only for a moment I see them…



It takes every bit of energy I have left to take my next breath….
A slow drug like sensation takes over me as I breath out…


I can feel the life slowly scurrying from my limp body…



I look once more on him…he stands there in tears…his hands are at his sides shivering in fear and regret. Although I cannot say it or show it…I forgive him….



He has released me from this spiteful world…Just as I had asked of him so long ago…I am free now.



I lay here…conscious on the edge of death.

Everything is dark now…everything is silent….