I think we all have that one person in our lives that thinks we can’t do anything and has absolutely no faith in us.
Well mine happens to be my whole family.
They’re so god damn paranoid and sexist it hurts. No one has any sort of faith in me to do anything except things that have to do with being a housewife.
I’d rather die than be a housewife. I want to be a hard working woman who leads her own life without a man for support.
I just want them to give me some trust. Just a bit of faith to prove myself. I HATE it when they say ‘You gotta earn my trust first.’
HOW THE FUCK DO I EARN YOUR TRUST WHEN YOU FUCKING FLAT OUT REFUSE TO GIVE ME ANY?! HOW DO I PROVE MYSELF WHEN I DON’T HAVE A WAY TO YOU THICK HEADED MORONS!
The worse part is I can’t get the courage to actually tell them I want more freedom.
Every time I do I get this damn fear that they’ll hate me for it. I won’t be perfect to them anymore.
I can’t stand up for myself. I hate that I can’t. I freeze in fear. It’s stupid.
I always feel so intimidated, I’m scared of the consequences. I hate it. I hate how much of a coward I am.
I pride myself for being so bold and brave, I don’t fear the dark, or horror movies, or spiders, clowns, heights. Hell, I balanced across a slippery log over six feet in the air when we were hiking just because I could.
I’ve snuck out several times out in the dark for the thrill of it.
If I think a ghost or somebody broke in, the first thing I’m going to do is grab my knife and charge.
But when it comes to standing up against my family, I become a chicken shit.
I get nervous, my voice goes quiet, I start to panic.
I feel like I’m walking on eggshells. My family are short tempered people. I’m always scared of setting them off.
My dad’s an alcoholic with anger issues, while my mom is…. Just overbearing. Way too protective. She sheltered me severely.
I live with my grandma, who wants me to be a housewife, but I don’t know how to tell her in a nice way I don’t want to be one.
She’s discouraged me from going to college once. I want to go to college.
I’m just so tired of them. Their sexism.
At eleven my brother walked to school, which was about ten miles, when at thirteen I couldn’t walk down the damn road because ‘You’re a girl, you’ll get kidnapped and raped and you can’t defend yourself.’
WE LIVE IN A SMALL TOWN FOR FUCK’S SAKE. I RARELY EVER HEAR OF KIDNAPPINGS AND RAPES! AND WHEN I DO EVERY ONCE IN A BLUE MOON IT’S ALWAYS FAR AWAY!
I CAN’T EVEN GO IN THE WOODS IN BROAD DAYLIGHT!
THE WOODS ARE MY LIFE!!!!
My grandma is paranoid about the bears and the bear traps. Like I don’t know how to watch my step.
I just want some freedom, some trust, some damn leeway. I can’t even walk around the fair alone. Its ridiculous.
I’m over it. I can’t do it anymore, I can feel the anger from this and other issues in my life poisoning me. It’s slowly killing me.
But my opinion and feelings don’t matter. I’m not allowed to lose my temper.
I just want to be free. Is that too much to ask?